Runaway Soul
by deepwater1978
Summary: Sometimes people run away to be alone, but sometimes they run away to see if you care enough to follow them...
1. Chapter 1

**Damon**

I'm not the good guy. I'm the selfish one. I take what I want. I do what I want. I lie to my brother, I fall in love with his girl, I don't do the right thing. I don't deserve her but my brother does.

 **Elena**

Something happened. I realized something about him... about us. I'm telling you, it's the most real thing that I have ever felt in my entire life. I love him. I love Damon. But he is running away.


	2. Chapter 2

_Thirteen years earlier…_

 **Damon**

Guilty.

I killed Klaus Mikaelson, although I had almost succeeded in getting myself killed. He deserved to die. Even now, sitting in the juvenile court room facing the jury, I still had wanted him to die. When I thought of the eldest spoiled son of the Mickaelson's family, my blood would boil. He killed Katherine. If Klaus hadn't showered Katherine with gifts and attention. If he hadn't turn her head and won her away from me, maybe things would have turned out differently for everyone concerned.

The memory still left a bitter taste in my mouth. I loved Katherine, really loved her. There had always been an inherent rivalry between Klaus and me. Klaus had always enjoyed stealing Katherine's attention away from me. Katherine, captivated, overwhelmed, had fallen completely under Klaus' spell. Within a month she was pregnant. Klaus had denied the baby was his, saying she was just after his family's money. Klaus had even gone so far as to spread lies that Katherine had gone to bed with half a dozen other men during the time he had been seeing her. Katherine had been totally shattered. She felt that she had no other way out except to take her own life. I would never forget the day I found her lying on the floor of her room, blood flowing from the wrists she had slashed in a frenzy of despair. I had frantically tried to stop the bleeding from her wounds. It had been no use. She was dead.

Grief-stricken, I found Klaus in one of the bars, surrounded by his hangers-on, boasting about his sexual prowess. I lost control and threw a punch on his face. Klaus pulled out a knife from somewhere and slashed my arm. Enraged, I grabbed a bronze sculpture nearby and smashed it on his head. Everyone was shocked as Klaus collapsed onto the floor.

The Mikaelson's family swore revenge. My father employed the best lawyers to defense my case. I couldn't care less. Katherine was dead, nothing mattered anymore. My lawyers had plea-bargained for a manslaughter charge to avoid a murder conviction and after two weeks of trial, the jury had imposed a thirteen year sentence and I was handcuffed to a van that would transport me to the Youth Correction Center.


	3. Chapter 3

_Thirteen years later…_

 **Elena**

I felt free.

The alternating flashes of dark and soft lights, the movement of sweaty bodies dancing, grinding, enjoying each other—The Wild Fire Club got into my blood and turned me on in a way that I hadn't let anyone or anything else do in quite some time.

I was happily doing all the things I never usually got to do, such as getting drunk on double lychee martinis, flirting with the bartender, laughing like some silly girls with my friends and generally getting loose. Usually Elena Gilbert was such a 'good girl'. Tonight I was a 'wild girl'. Tonight I had decided not to hold back anymore.

No matter how hard you try to be 'good', life still sucked, I thought. Being 'good' didn't make you less vulnerable. In fact, you would end up being hurt. Sad, wasn't it?

Liam Davis and I started dating since medical school. I was happy. Everyone envied our relationship. Liam was an orthopaedics resident and I was a surgical resident at VHC Medical Centre in Virginia. We both liked our jobs and we rarely fought. I believed that I would spend the rest of my life with him but when I found him in bed with Nadia, the theatre nurse in his apartment, I realised I was being an idiot to believe in fairy tales. Men were jerks!

I was having a great time with my friends April Young and Liv Parker at the club. The best time I'd had in months after I broke up with Liam. Tonight was a farewell party. I would be moving back to Mystic Falls in two weeks. I had accepted a job as a surgical resident in Mystic Falls Hospital. It was a smaller hospital compared to VHC Medical Centre, but I was grateful for anything that would get me out of VHC Medical Centre and away from Liam.

"Has anybody seen him?" Liv asked, with a small drunken giggle.

Craning her neck, April looked around the crowd in the club. "My God!" she burst out, staring at the adjoining booth. "Who is that? He's absolutely gorgeous."

"Who are you talking about?" I asked, peering about the room. "I can't see…"My words trailed off as my eyes met the black leather jacket, the air leaving my lungs, suddenly sucked out by the sight that met me. The man…he was…gorgeous. Incredibly gorgeous. I couldn't look away, his appearance magnetizing. He was accompanied by a beautiful blonde, and a skinny white man.

"I've seen better-looking men," I answered casually while taking another sip of my lychee martini.

"He is looking at us!" April almost yelled out and I rolled my eyes.

"Can I buy you girls another round?" the skinny white man approached us and gave us a smile. "We are here to celebrate my sister's birthday," he wrapped his arm around the beautiful blonde. "The more the merrier, right?"

I wanted to say no but my two friends eagerly accepted the offer of another round of drinks. I glanced at the man next to the blonde and found my eyes meeting icy blue ones. I quickly looked away. The eye contact had been uncomfortably intense.

Minutes later the skinny white man came back with a tray of drinks and the girls were chatting on some movie stars. The man remained quiet and his face was expressionless. He was probably bored, I thought. "Would you like to dance?" I asked, smiling at him as if he were an old friend. Maybe he would feel more comfortable after a dance.

He looked startled. He's going to reject you, Elena Gilbert! My pride had never felt so bruised. But a drunken shove from the blonde persuaded him to get up.

Grabbing my hand, he led me onto the crowded floor and we started to dance. As if on cue, the disc jockey switched into a slow tune. When he pulled me close I felt surprisingly comfortable in his arms.

"You can dance,' I said, smiling into his eyes.

For a moment he studied my face with heightened interest, reassessing, re-evaluating. His eyes weren't light blue as I'd originally thought, but an intriguing mixtures of pale blue and metallic grey, and his hair was dark brown almost black, not black. We stayed on the dance-floor for a long time before he steered me to the other side, away from my friends. Out of sight, he edged me into a corner and began kissing me.

"You'd better stop that," I murmured, attempting to push him away.

"Why?" he said teasingly. His voice was low and husky but sexy, very sexy. His hands were sliding up the sides of my neck to tenderly cradle my face.

"What are you doing?" I whispered inanely as he began slowly rubbing his thumb over my lower lip.

"I think you are sexy as hell," he whispered, slowly lowering his head, "And I want to kiss you."

His mouth covered mine in an electrifyingly seductive kiss that sent sparks exploding through my entire body. I had been kissed before, but no one had ever kissed me like he did. His hands shifted, one of them drifting down my spine to draw me closer, while the other slid behind my nape, and his mouth slowly opened on mine. Lost in the kiss, I moved my hands inside his leather jacket, up his chest, over his broad shoulders, and then I wrapped my arms around his neck.

It seemed like hours later when he finally dragged his mouth from mine. My heart racing like a trip-hammer, I stood in the circle of his arms, my forehead resting on his chest, while I tried to cope with the turbulent sensations I had felt.

"Let's go somewhere," he whispered hoarsely.

"Where are you taking me?" I whispered, feeling lightheaded and suddenly quite bold as he steered me towards the exit.

"You place," he answered, a strong possessive arm fiercely round my waist.

Outside on the street he waved down a cab and bundled me inside.

"Why not your place?" I asked breathlessly.

"No, not my place. Your place," he said before seizing my lips in a ravenous, devouring kiss that stole my breath, and drove me mad with pleasure. I was well aware that I had too much to drink. My head was spinning, but somehow it didn't bother me. I wanted this. Never in my life had I felt a need like this.

Once we arrived at my place, I paid off the cab driver and he pushed me up against the wall outside my apartment and started once more with the kissing. I could barely breathe. This was so insane and so unlike Elena Gilbert. But I couldn't stop myself. I let him into the building and led him straight to the elevator where he crowded me into a corner. Within seconds his hands were everywhere.

"How rough can you take it?" he asked, leading me out of the elevator and into my apartment.

I was trying not to pant. "I don't know," I replied honestly. "Why don't you show me what you got?" and before he could answer, I pressed myself against his full length and kissed him long and lingeringly.

He wanted this, he wanted me—I knew it the moment his arms encircled me, pulling me tightly against his hardening body. His mouth seized mine in a hungry, consuming kiss. After a while he began to undress me, slowly at first, then becoming frantic. I responded by ripping at his shirt, pulling down the zipper on his pants. We were kissing and fumbling with our clothes, until the room tilted as I was brought down onto the sofa beside a hard, demanding, naked male body.

I sucked in a breath as his free hand moved to my collarbone.

"You're trembling," he rasped into my ear, making me tremble all the more. As he spoke, he reached into one of his pockets and pulled out a condom. Then he moved to climb on top of me, straddling my hips, his hands holding my wrists firmly above my head. He bent his face to mine, angling his head as he took my lips. His kiss was different this time, his tongue demanding, invading, greedy, like he couldn't get enough, like he wanted to devour me. I gave him everything he asked for, lips surrendering, body submitting, my hips bucking in reflexive anticipation. I moaned out a protest when he took his mouth away, but not for long as it stayed attached to my body, moving down along my jaw, then to my neck, licking, sucking, and biting as it went. And then he stopped.

Cradling my face between his palms, he ordered hoarsely, "Look at me." Somehow I managed to surface from my sensual daze; I forced my lids open and looked into his scorching eyes. The moment I did, he drove into me with a force that tore a low cry from my throat and made my body arch like a bow. He covered my lips with his and, with infinite gentleness, began to move inside me, withdrawing almost all the way and slowly plunging deep, steadily increasing the tempo of his driving strokes, giving and giving and giving until I was wild beneath him. My fingernails bit into his back and hips, clutching him to me, while the passion raging inside my body built into a holocaust, and still it went on and on, until it finally exploded in long soul-destroying bursts of extravagant pleasure. Gathering me into his arms, he shoved his fingers into my hair, kissing me with fiery urgency, and drove into me one more time. It was beautiful and riveting. I could feel his heart beating as I moved onto my side with him, my face pressed against his chest, his arms tight around me. I had never felt so totally at peace and satisfied. I didn't want it to end. Within minutes, I felt asleep.

When I woke in the morning, I was lying on my bed, flat on my back, completely naked, covered only by a sheet. He had left. It was then that I realised I didn't even know his name.


	4. Chapter 4

_Three months later…_

 **Damon**

I found it difficult to believe that I finally was home, harder still to realise I had been away for thirteen years. I was back in Mystic Falls. I pulled the collar of my leather jacket close to my neck to shield myself from the November wind before I bent to place a bouquet of white lilies on the grave. Lillian Salvatore's grave – my mother's grave. The wind caught my sigh as I straightened. "Hi mum," I whispered softly, "I'm back."

My mother died after giving birth to my brother, Stefan from severe post-partum haemorrhage. The doctors tried everything to stop the bleeding but it had been no use. She never left the operating room. I was seven at that time and I didn't understand why my mother never came home after she delivered my baby brother. Until one night I overhead my father's conversation with my uncle Zach and I realised she would never come back. My father was completely shattered as he lost his wife, the mother of his children and the love of his life. He didn't marry again after my mother died despite having multiple brief relationships with different women. When you lost somebody; every candle, every prayer was not going to make up for the fact that the only thing that you had left was a hole in your life where that somebody that you cared about used to be.

I shared a very close bond and relationship with my mother when I was a child as I was the first born child. My mother was a beautiful woman who had passion in life. As a child I basically worshiped her and everything about her. My father had always said that I took after my mother in terms of looks and physical appearance, as there is a very strong physical resemblance between the two of us. My mother was also a very good cook. She could make the most amazing food out of simple ingredients. I used to love watching her cooking in the kitchen when I was a child.

As the eldest son of the Salvatore's family, I tried to keep up with my father's expectation. I tried to be the best brother for Stefan since he had never had the chance to meet our mother. Unfortunately I failed miserably, both as a son and as a brother. I was a disappointment, a disgrace to the family. I hadn't seen my father or Stefan since the day I was sent to jail.

"Damon?" A deep male baritone voice behind me brought me out of my thoughts.

I turned around and saw a handsome and athletic young man in a light grey round-neck long-sleeve T-shirt. I raised my eyebrow. Who's this guy? I thought.

"Damon? Is that you?" he asked again and moved closer.

"How do you know my name?" I asked, my voice was cold and harsh.

"Stefan," he took another step closer and he drew in a shaky breath, "I'm Stefan."

The air punched hard out of my lungs when I heard the name. Stefan. My brother was standing right in front of me.

"Hello brother."

"It's you," Stefan said softly and came to a halt in front of me. I didn't move. I studied the young man in front of me. My baby brother had all grown up now. With a pale complexion, broad forehead, angular jawline and a pair deep-set, forest green eyes, Stefan was a classically handsome young man. My parents would be proud of him.

"When…uh…when did you get out…" Stefan stammered. It seemed like he couldn't find the right words.

"Three months ago," I replied.

Stefan stared at me, eyes wide with shock. "Three months?" His voice raised a little, "And you didn't bother to come home?"

I shrugged. "Trust me, it's in the best interest for everyone."

"Then why are you here now?" Stefan snapped. "Why are you here?"

Blowing out a long breath, I took a step forward. "Look Stefan, I know you are upset but trust me, you don't want me to hang around. You don't want to see me."

"You refused to see us for the last thirteen years!" Stefan yelled out.

"Visiting me in prison, with all the security checks, thick bars, uniformed men, and violent-looking criminals at every turn, is a harsh reality check!" I retorted. My hands clenched at my sides. "I'm a disappointment! I'm disgrace! Don't you see that, Stefan?"

We fell into an awkward silence for a few seconds before Stefan spoke again, "We are family, Damon."

For the first time in my life, I had nothing to say.

"You know what they say, you can choose your friends, but you're stuck with family," Stefan explained patiently, "no matter what happens you are always stuck with us, with me." His voice broke on the last word and my chest was tight with emotion. I moved forward and wrapped my arms around Stefan.

"Dad misses you too," Stefan said softly. "He would be glad to see you."

"No," I removed myself from Stefan's embrace. "I can't…I can't see him yet."

Stefan frowned. "Why?"

"I need some time. Please understand." My heart twisted painfully inside my chest.

Stefan hesitated. Then he nodded. "Forgive yourself Damon. Find a way to get back the life you gave up. Losing it would be the biggest tragedy of all. If Mum was alive, it would kill her to see you give up."

Squeezing my eyes tightly shut to decrease the burning sensation beneath my eyelids from tears I refused to shed, I swallowed a sob that was rising in my chest. "I know. I need time, maybe a lot of time."

x x x

I came awake from the nightmare with a start, just like I always did. I was sweating and breathing hard. My face was wet with tears. It had been so long since I'd had the dream; I had forgotten how devastated and empty it left me feeling. But now I remembered. I remembered with perfect clarity and it felt like a sharp knife being plunged into my chest. I sat up in the bed trying to catch my breath. The image of Katherine covered with blood would haunt me for the rest of my life. I just knew it.

Three months ago when I got out of prison, I went straight to find Trevor. Trevor was an inmate I knew a few years ago and he got out a few months earlier. I had decided to crash in his place instead of going back to Mystic Falls. Trevor's sister Rose managed to get me a part time job at the kitchen in the small café she worked. Rose had been out of school since sixteen and she had always wanted to be a singer. Believe me, she did have the talent and I had heard her sing. She had made an amateur demo tape, scored a few gigs as backup singer, but not as many as she would like. And no producers had ever stepped forward and threw a contract at her. I would have given up if I was her. Rose was very persistent and she believed her lucky star would strike her one day.

Rose was an attractive and pretty young woman with dark brown hair and green eyes. Although I wouldn't mind losing myself in Rose for a little while, I had no desire to get involved with a woman. Any woman. Not after Katherine. Until I met her.

We were in a club celebrating Rose's birthday. There was plenty going on in the club. The dance-floor was alive with beautiful, sexy women. Trevor and Rose decided to join a group of girls in the next booth. One girl in particular caught my attention. Damn, she's beautiful! I thought when our eyes met. And she had the same brown doe-eyes like Katherine.

As the evening progressed, I found myself becoming more and more attracted to her. She was so damn sexy. My heart nearly stopped when she leaned over asking me if I wanted to hit the dance-floor. I hesitated but in the end I accepted her offer. It felt so right to have her in my arms. I wanted her and I knew she wanted me almost as much when she pressed her body against mine. I was not a knight in shining armour, and I was a long way from being a naive, idealistic teenager. I knew what was happening between us at that moment. I wanted to take her to bed and undress her and make love to her as thoroughly and leisurely as I could. And I did.

Now I couldn't get her out of my mind. Her fragrance, her lips, her skin, her hair…I missed all of them. Unfortunately I didn't know her name. It would have been nice to know her name.

 _Find a woman, someone to take your mind off, Damon._

But the thought of spending the night in the bed of any other woman but her left me cold. Nothing has been real since I lost Katherine until she came along. Kissing her, holding her after all those years, had made things worse. It was like something was awakening deep inside of me, a sensation that was familiar, yet not. Certainly, it wasn't comfortable.

 _Forget her. Forget what it felt like to lose yourself in her softness, her scent, the feel of her lush curves and deliciously eager mouth._

I cursed, knowing I would be sleeping alone tonight again. And this time, those memories would be much more vivid, newer, and more real than ever before.

Damon Salvatore was so completely screwed…and definitely not in a good way.


	5. Chapter 5

_Three months later…_

 **Elena**

"I'm starving!" I said as I slid my tray into the seat across Caroline and Andie.

"The crazy Professor Tanner is making you work hard again?" Caroline glanced at her watch. "Jesus, it's almost two! Is he a human? Doesn't he eat?"

"No, he is not human," I laughed and both Caroline and Andie burst into laughter. Both Caroline and Andie had been like my mates since I had started my surgical residency at Mystical Falls Hospital three months ago. Caroline was a resident in internal medicine as she had always wanted to become a physician. Andie was a senior theatre nurse, and it was largely due to her help and support that I could endure working with the crazy, inhumane Professor Tanner.

"I thought you were on a diet?" I cocked an eyebrow at Caroline's tray filled with French fries, meat-ball spaghetti and a chocolate brownie.

Caroline shook her head. "The food today is so delicious. I wonder whether the cafeteria has employed a new chef."

"Glad you brought the subject," Andie said and leaned forward. "Did you see the new guy in the food bar?" she whispered. "God, he is so hot!"

I rolled my eyes. "Please. When are you girls going to stop looking at boys?"

"Trust me, he is really hot," Andie said as she slid back into her chair.

"Your Dr Maxfield is hot too but why did you let him go Andie?" Caroline teased, "Not hot enough in bed?" she joked.

Andie made a face. "Wes is hot but he is a geek. All he cares about is bacteria and viruses."

I swallowed a giggle. "Well, he is a microbiologist….You can't blame him."

"I want something different. A man, a real man. Hot, sexy, and maybe a little dangerous," she smiled.

"Hey, there, lovely ladies. May I join you?"

We looked up to see Stefan Salvatore, tray in hand, smiling down at us. Both Caroline and Andie gave me a quick glance. They knew Stefan liked me– he'd made that very clear – and he seized every opportunity to be in my presence.

"Feel free," Caroline said and jerked her head toward the empty chair beside me.

As Stefan laid his tray beside mine and plopped down in the seat, I gave Caroline a quick glare, but then I softened my glance. How could I blame Caroline when any other response would have come across as rude?

Stefan is also a surgical resident at Mystic Falls. How would I describe him? Stefan was compassionate, kind, noble, honourable, intelligent, responsible, academic, dutiful, and a gentleman. He was definitely seen as the 'Golden Boy' of Mystic Falls Hospital. He had been very helpful and supportive when I first started working here. I like him. I was grateful for what he had done. Both Caroline and Andie felt Stefan and I could have an epic love if I gave him a chance. But something was missing and I knew it. I knew the answer. It was him.

He and Stefan were such a contrast. Stefan was classically handsome and had a heart-warming smile. He was always seen to be happy, optimistic and light-hearted. Comfortable would be the word to describe when I was with Stefan. But he, on the other hand, was different. There was something different about him, dangerous. But not in a way that scared me. He was exciting. Yeah, right. I almost smiled as I remembered my body's reaction at our first meeting. His scent, his heat, his touch, that sinful mouth. It was everything I could have possibly dreamed and more. And who could blame me? Any red-blooded girl would react the same way to Mr. Sexy, Dangerous and Incredibly Handsome.

"Stefan is waiting," Caroline said, pulling me out of my reverie.

I blinked. "For what?"

"Your answer," Stefan said. "Do you want to go to the Founder's party? You know it's a charity and your father was a Founder's member." He turned his eyes to Caroline as if for support.

"You should go. Tyler and I are going," Caroline took a sip of her Diet Coke. "It will be fun, like a double date," she winked at me.

I nearly choked on my sandwich and I glared at her.

"Andie, you should come as well," Stefan turned to Andie.

Andie shook her head. "Oh no, I'm not going to a boring charity party," she said with a chuckle, "Leave me out of this." She dropped her eyes to her plate and tucked into her meal, effectively dismissing him.

Stefan turned his attention back to me, "Elena…"

"Okay, I will go." I muttered. I couldn't very well keep avoiding Stefan. We could stay as friends. Simple as that, I decided. "See you later, guys," I said brightly as I stood up. "Got to get back to work. I don't want to miss out the Whipple procedure this afternoon."

With a quick smile and a nod to Caroline and Andie I turned and headed to the front of the cafeteria where I deposited my tray on the counter. Then I hurried out of there before Caroline made further comments.

x x x

The Whipple procedure took almost five hours. I was completely exhausted at the end of the surgery. But Professor Tanner insisted reviewing all the patients in the ward after the operation. It was almost nine o'clock by the time I finished all the paperwork. I checked my clock when I got to the cafeteria. It was ten minutes past nine. I was trying my luck to see whether I could get a bite before leaving the hospital. The lights in the cafeteria were still on and I saw a man with his back facing me cleaning the tables.

"Excuse me," I reached behind the man in white uniform and tapped on his shoulder gently. "Any chance I can still get some food? I just left the operating room…..."

The man turned around. I nearly fainted when I saw the face. I was face-to-face with him. Mr Sexy, Dangerous and Incredibly Handsome. I couldn't talk, couldn't think, and couldn't form a single coherent thought. Oh God, was this really happening? There were dozen times I had dreamt about seeing him again but when I did see him again, I was like a complete nervous wreck. I had to get out of here. Not watching where I was going, I didn't see the chair behind me, tripped over and ended up falling on the floor. In my head, I envisioned myself as a comical cartwheel of flailing arms and legs.

Yep, I made a fool of myself. Right in front of Mr Sexy, Dangerous and Incredibly Handsome.

I was thinking that as I tried and right myself as quickly as possible. Before I could get up, however, strong hands were gripping my arms and hauling me to my feet.

"Are you alright?" His blue eyes were full of concern.

"I'm just glad I didn't break any bone," I blurted.

He raised his eye brow. "Are you sure you are okay?"

"Oh yeah," I laughed uneasily. "I'm a doctor. I know my body parts well." I saw his mouth dropped open a tiny bit and I felt my cheeks went up in flames. Oh sweet Lord, what did I just say?

His mouth quirked into a half smile, and he regarded me with a lazy gaze. "So you know your body parts well uh?"

I knew I was staring, but I couldn't seem to keep my eyes off the lips that were so close. And, despite all the reasons I shouldn't, I wanted him to kiss me so badly.

What the hell was wrong with me?

Stepping away from him so I could think, I smiled sheepishly. "Sorry about this. I know you guys are close. I'd better get going."

"Have you eaten?" He asked.

"I had lunch. I'll grab a bite when I'm at home."

"I will make you something."

My eyebrows lifted and he motioned for me to have a seat before walking back to the kitchen.

So he was a chef? Andie mentioned a new guy in the cafeteria this afternoon. Was he the new guy?

Almost ten minutes had passed before he came out of the kitchen. He was carrying a tray with both hands. "Here you go," he gingerly placed the tray on the table. "I hope you like Swiss cheese on rye bread. If you want an omelette or anything else, I can fix it for you."

"This is perfect," I said taking a bite of the bread. "It tastes great."

He smiled.

My food was suddenly tasteless, and all I could think about was his oh-so-clever mouth doing wonderful things to my body.

"You aren't eating," he pointed out.

I stared down at my plate, realizing I had paused, my bread was only half eaten. I hurriedly dug into my meal, watching him from underneath my eyelashes. There were a million questions buzzing around in my head but I didn't want to inundate him. The silence stretched between us. Quickly, I finished my bread and then tackled the cup of iced tea. All done, I placed the glass on the tray and stood up. "It was delicious. Uh, thanks," I stammered.

"Hey Damon!" Someone called out from the kitchen.

"Coming!" he replied. "Sorry, we need to close…"

"Sure. How much do I need to pay?" I fumbled through my purse.

"No charge."

My eyes widen. Our eyes met for a moment.

"Damon!"

"I'd better go," he said and hurried toward the kitchen.

All the way back home I was thinking about him. Damon. His name was Damon.

Caroline once told me that men could be divided into two categories. The first ones were those boys whom you could bring them to meet your parents and they will fall in love with them straightaway. They were the safe ones. Stefan fell into this category.

Then there were the men that were anything but safe. They could draw you to them so intensely that you became consumed by them, absolutely focused on everything they did and said. But they could hurt you and break your heart. Damon definitely fell into this category. And I had to run away from him, far and fast.


	6. Chapter 6

**Damon**

I hadn't felt so good in months. Maybe years. First and foremost, the simple answer was that the job at Mystic Falls Hospital had been something I had wanted and enjoyed. Getting a job with my background wasn't easy. Let's face it. I committed a crime and I was an ex-convict. There was no way I could get a well-paid job in a nice big company despite having a master degree which I managed to earn in the last thirteen years. I had always enjoyed cooking and I had started reading my mother's cooking books since I was a child. When a friend of Rose had recommended this job, I had jumped at it with nothing more than my career in mind. Now, however, I had another reason.

The other reason was not something I was ready to share with anyone. I was becoming more and more attracted to Elena with each passing day and it scared me senseless. Elena was a doctor, a highly qualified professional with a bright future. Who was Damon Salvatore? Nothing but an ex-convict. We both know I wasn't her type and would never be her type. Elena could just be an emotional disaster waiting to happen, and I could not take the risk.

x x x

"Thanks for helping out today," Matt took out a bottle of orange juice from the refrigerator and reached for the ice in the freezer, "Lunch on Sunday is always busy. I don't think I can manage without you."

I shrugged as I arranged the cheese sandwiches on a hot grill. "Gotta make a living. Gotta pay the rent."

Matt Donovan was the owner of Mystic Grill. Mystic Grill, often simply referred to as "the Grill" was a restaurant, café, and bar in Mystic Falls which was opened a few years ago by the Donovan's family. It was a popular hangout for teenagers and young adults in town since then. I only worked five days at the cafeteria in Mystic Fall Hospital and the extra money from working on the weekends at the Grill was what I needed. I would love to have my own café one day. A café serving my own menu.

"Two chicken burgers and two large OJs for table five." One of the waiters dropped an order to the kitchen.

"On their way," I answered.

For the next hour, Matt and I worked through the lunch rush and at two, the lunch rush started winding down, and the Grill started to empty of the steady stream of customers. I was just about to take a break, grab a drink and sit down for a minute, when I heard a female voice calling out.

"Excuse me, can anyone take an order? I have been sitting here for almost ten minutes."

I sauntered over and saw a beautiful blonde in a floral dress and sandal looking annoyed.

"Now what can I get…you…?" My words trailed off as my eyes met the brunette beside the blonde. It was Elena Gilbert. Her eyes widen. I could read the shock in her eyes. Obviously this was a surprise to her also. Before I could think straight, a woman with shoulder-length hair pointed her finger at me and said, "I recognise you. You work in the cafeteria at Mystic Falls Hospital."

"Yes, uh, ready to take your orders ladies?" I asked, my voice forced and formal.

"Calamari salad," the blonde said, studying the menu as if she had never seen it before. "Large OJ and a chocolate cheesecake."

"I will have the chicken fettuccine and a cappuccino," the other woman flashed me her beautiful smile. "By the way, we work in the hospital as well. I'm Andie."

I didn't say a word, merely gave her an almost imperceptible nod. "What about you?" I looked at Elena.

For a moment our eyes met. She broke away the stare and studied the menu, "uh Caesar salad and a large OJ."

"Thanks. They are on their way." I picked up the menus and walked back to the kitchen. I took a deep breath and asked myself in a critical whisper, "What is the matter with me?" I didn't know what had gotten into me. I had never reacted to a woman this way. Except Elena.

"Damon, are you alright?" Matt's voice brought me back to reality.

"Sure, I'm fine," I straightened and dropped the order on the counter. "Why don't I take over? You can have a break," I put the apron on and opened the refrigerator. Something in the kitchen would distract me and calm me down.

"No, you have worked non-stop for the last few hours…"

"That wasn't a question, Matt. I'm taking over. You go," I insisted.

Almost an hour had passed before I finished working in the kitchen. I was worn-out. I sighed as I grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator. As I went out of the kitchen I collided with a woman. She rocked back, almost toppling over. My hands managed to grab her arms before she fell to the floor.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I…yes, I'm okay," she replied.

I released my hands and took a look at the woman in front. She was with Elena. Her name was Andie.

"Sorry, I didn't see you…" I apologised.

"No, no. It's my fault, I wasn't looking," Andie said with a husky laugh. 'Remember me? I'm Andie. You took our order just now…"

"I remember you Andie," I smiled.

"But I don't know your name…" she whispered in a throaty purr. Her smile turned saccharine sweet.

She was flirting with me. I had always had great success with women despite being an ex-convict. They fell for my smouldering blue eyes contrasting wonderfully against my darkened lashes and eyebrows, the casual disarray dark brown almost black hair which hung just over my ears, and my "bad-boy" smile. I studied Andie from head to toe. She was an attractive woman with brown hair and a great body.

I proffered my hand, "Damon."

Andie took my hand, shook it but didn't let go. "Hi Damon," she grinned. "Are you on a break? Why don't you join us for a drink? My friends and I…"

"Andie, what takes you so long…" Elena came behind Andie but stopped dead when she saw me. Her eyes narrowed when she saw Andie holding my hand.

"Hey Elena," Andie released my hand and turned to Elena. "This is Damon. Damon, this is Elena."

"I know," I blurted out. Both women looked at me, a questioning look in their eyes. Damn, why did I say that?

"I, uh, I saw your ID card the other day," I lied, trying to sound casual. How smart, Damon Salvatore! "In the hospital."

"Right," Andie nodded.

Three of us stood there in silence for a moment before Andie finally spoke. "We are going to see a movie afterwards. Do you want to join us?"

Elena's brows rose. Was there a small flicker of jealousy that crossed her feature? You must be hallucinating, Damon Salvatore!

"Sorry, I still have a lot of work to do in the kitchen," I forced a smile. "Maybe next time."

Elena cleared her throat. "I think we should go Andie." And then she pulled Andie back to their table.

"You know Elena Gilbert?" Vicky Donovan asked as she came through the kitchen with a tray in her hand.

"She works in the hospital," I answered as I took the tray from her. "Do you know her?"

"Her father Grayson Gilbert used to be a Founder's member but the whole family moved to Richmond more than twenty years ago. Grayson Gilbert was a very successful surgeon in Richmond."

"Was?"

"He died when Elena was in high school. Car crash. He and his wife died on the spot."

I cringed at the thought of Elena losing both her parents at such an early age. There was so much about Elena I didn't know. So much I wanted to know. Like everything that had happened to her from the time she left the birth canal to when she'd walked into the Grill this afternoon.

Stefan showed up on my doorstep later that evening. I gave him a beer and opened one for myself. The silence between us felt strange, yet comfortable, I thought.

"Next weekend is my birthday," Stefan said softly.

"I know," I took a sip of my beer. How could I forget his birthday?

"Mum died when I was born…"

"Hey, look at me," I leaned forward and held his hand, "don't you ever feel guilty, OK? It's not your fault."

"I wish I'd known her."

"She would be very proud of you, Stefan."

We sat quietly for a moment.

"I'm asking a few friends to come over for dinner that night. Will you come?" Stefan asked.

I frowned.

"Dad will be in Seattle that weekend. You won't bump into him. You can't keep avoiding him."

"I know," I took a long gulp of my beer. "Can we talk about something else? Why aren't you celebrating your birthday with someone special? Someone special like a girl. A girlfriend."

"I don't have a girlfriend," Stefan smiled sheepishly. "Well, there's a girl. A girl I really like, from the hospital."

"Then go for it. What are you waiting for?"

"I'm not sure whether she likes me or not," Stefan sighed and dropped his shoulders.

"Just ask her out," I took two more bottles of beer from the refrigerator and passed one to Stefan. "Girls don't wait around for you to sweep them off their feet, brother."

"She is different. She is kinda special," Stefan smiled.

"Somebody's in love," I teased.

Stefan picked up a small cushion and threw it at me. I laughed.

"Well, is she coming over for dinner next weekend?" I asked. Stefan nodded.

"I'm curious to meet this girl who makes my baby brother behaving like a teenager in the throes of his first big crush," I winked with a smirk.

"You are coming?" Stefan asked. I could see excitement in his eyes.

"Sure," I grinned, "won't miss it."


	7. Chapter 7

**Elena**

As I pulled into the driveway of the Salvatore's house, I noted two vehicles parked in the shadow of the house beside Stefan's pickup. Andie and I got out of my SUV, and, as we rounded the bumper of the pickup, I recognised one of the vehicles as the same make and model Caroline drove. The other vehicle was a blue basic 1969 Chevy Camaro Convertible. Who else was coming? I wondered.

Stefan had invited us over to his house to celebrate his birthday tonight. Caroline and Andie had been harassing me to accept his invitation, so I gave in. It wasn't a date. Caroline, Tyler and Andie would be there as well. Besides, Stefan and I were friends. Having dinner with a friend was no big deal. At the front door, I pushed the doorbell half-hidden beneath a spray of dried flowers hanging on the door frame. Seconds after we heard the chime echoing inside, the door flew open.

"Elena. Andie." Stefan was wearing a dark blue round-necked T-shirt and a navy blazer. He could have easily made all the male doctors at Mystic Falls envious.

"Happy Birthday, Stefan," I smiled and handed a package wrapped in a colourful foil paper to him. "I got you the CD of the Beatles. Tyler said you like Beatles."

"Thanks, Elena," Stefan said, taking the CD with his hand. "I couldn't love it more."

"Where are the others?" Andie asked.

"They are in the living room." Stefan led us into the entry hall. "My brother's here too," he announced as we reached the living room.

"You have a brother?" I asked, surprised.

Stefan nodded. "He is in charge of the dinner tonight. Trust me, he is a bloody good cook," he smiled and winked at me, "There he is."

I turned around and my smile froze. Damon.

"Ladies" Stefan said, seemingly unperturbed. "This is my brother Damon. Damon, say hello to Elena and Andie."

I felt faint. Was this some kind of sick joke? Stefan's brother. Damon was Stefan's brother.

I could read the surprise that flickered through his eyes.

"Damon? What a surprise to see you here." Andi moved closer to Damon, smiling.

"Do you know each other?" Stefan raised his brows and glanced at both of them.

Damon forced a smile and cleared his throat. "I, uh, met Andie at the Grill. I was working there last Sunday."

"Well, well," Andie murmured, her voice dropping into the teasing lilt that came as natural as to her as breathing while she studied Damon's face. "What a small world, don't you think so, Damon?"

Damon's eye shifted to Andie. A half smile tugged at his mouth. "I only came back to Mystic Falls a few months ago."

"Really? Have you been away? Where were you?" Andie clasped Damon's elbow, flashing her one-hundred watts smile.

I couldn't be jealous. I absolutely refused to dig my nails into Andie's arm.

"Dinner's almost ready," Damon said, shooting a glance at me. "I will check on the lasagne."

"I can give you a hand in the kitchen. I enjoy cooking as well…" Andie's voice trailed off as she followed Damon into the kitchen.

Damon Salvatore. Stefan's brother. I slept with Stefan's brother. What the hell was I supposed to do about that?

How I got through the dinner, I would never know. Now and then, Damon caught my eye across the dining table and I could have sworn the air crackled. Good god! It had been hard to ignore Damon Salvatore. Seeing him in body-hugging jeans that outlined all his male attributes, and a muscle-defining T-shirt, I'd be lucky if I didn't melt into a puddle right in the middle of Stefan's house.

Andie had been clinging to Damon the whole evening and obviously he gave every indication of enjoying her company. I turned away and walked to the backyard.

"Hi," a voice said beside me. My heart skipped a beat. It was Damon.

"Oh, hi," I said brightly. "Dinner was lovely. I must get the recipe of the spinach lasagne with feta cheese. And the apple pie – it's gorgeous. I'm sure my aunt Jenna would love it."

His eyes never left my face. "I didn't realize you can cook."

I laughed in spite of myself. "No, I can't cook but my aunt Jenna loves cooking. Uh, Andie can cook." I shot a glance at Andie who was busy chatting with Stefan and Tyler.

"Does it matter?" he asked wryly.

"Are you blind or what? You had Andie drooling all over you and your apple pie the whole night!" I cursed silently when the words came out. Dammit! I sounded like a jealous bitch.

Damon looked amused. "I thought you were too drunk to notice."

I rolled my eyes. "I wasn't drunk. I only had a glass of wine and a beer." I raised the half-empty bottle to him.

For several seconds, he gazed at me. My heart was pounding like crazy. I swallowed, hard. "uh, you said you just came back to Mystic Falls a few months ago. Where have you been?"

The smile disappeared. The amusement went out of his eyes. It was as if a curtain dropped, blanking out all thoughts and emotion. "Away. I was away." His voice was flat and toneless.

Did I miss something?

"Elena!" Stefan's voice interrupted us. "Caroline and Tyler are thinking of grabbing a drink at the Grill…" then he noticed Damon standing beside me. "Damon."

"I'm heading home," Damon gave a little pat on Stefan's shoulder. "You guys have fun."

"Do you mind giving me a lift?" Andie appeared at the exact moment. "I think I have had enough drinks tonight."

"Sure." With his hand on Andie's small back, Damon led her out of the backyard.

A strange sensation invaded my chest as I watched both Damon and Andie disappeared down the backyard, leaving me and Stefan alone. Was it jealousy? Damon got under my skin. I didn't know why. I sighed. Another drink at the Grill sounded like a pretty good idea to me.

x x

Another week passed. It had been a busy day. I flipped the pages of a medical file on one of the patients in the ward. It was seven o'clock, way past time for me to get home and try to get some rest but something about the case was nagging at me. I had the similar feelings as Professor Tanner that we had missed something, something important. Professor Tanner might not be the easiest surgeon to work with; he was no doubt the best in Mystic Falls. Sighing, I closed the file and put it back in the cabinet. I'd need to consult with the radiologist, to run more test.

As I approached the radiology department, I saw them in the alleyway. Damon's back was against the brick building and Andie was all over him, her hands in his hair, kissing Damon like he belonged to her. His hands were on her breast and her butt, holding her body against his, grinding against her. I froze and stood there like a damn statue. I was not sure how long I watched, my heart ready to pound out of my chest, unable to believe that it was really Damon kissing Andie. But, oh my God, it was. When they came up for air, his eyes immediately met mine, the look on his face unmistakable. Surprise. Shock. In that moment, my heart shattered into a million little pieces.

I had to run away. I stormed through the office door, scooping my jacket from the hook by my desk and bolting through the lobby and out the front door of the hospital. I didn't look back. I couldn't. I wanted nothing more than to get as far away from Damon as I could possibly get.

It was out of character for me to throw myself across my king-sized bed and give in to a torrent of tears. The cool, collected, and stable Dr Elena Gilbert rarely allowed her emotions to erupt so vehemently. But never had I felt so hurt. When the flow of tears was finally exhausted, I straightened the bed. Damn you, Damon Salvatore! I cursed him for making me feeling so vulnerable. Don't waste your time, Elena. He was not worth it, I told myself. Then my phone rang. It was Stefan.

'Hello?"

"Hi Elena. I hope you are still awake." Stefan voice was always so sincere. I smiled.

"What's up?"

"Do you want to go to movie tomorrow night? I know you aren't on-called. We can grab a bite at the Grill after work and then head to the cinema."

Caroline was right. I needed someone safe, like Stefan.

"Sure," I answered. "Why don't we meet at the hospital reception at six?"


	8. Chapter 8

**Damon**

In some part of my brain, probably the logical part that seemed to be missing at the moment, I knew I should walk away. Elena was the special girl. Stefan's special girl. I had never met anyone like Elena Gilbert. I didn't know what had gotten into me. I had never reacted to a woman this way. Not even Katherine. This was something more, something wild. Something…different. Logic was definitely not ruling my brain right now.

There was no doubt Elena was a beautiful woman. But my attraction to her went far deeper than that. Her attitude was kick-ass and woman, hear me roar. Just watched how she threw her head back and laughed. She was exactly what she wanted to be without apology. She walked and breathed and spoke pure sex, and any male in her nearby area scented it. I admired and appreciated such women, as they were too far and few between.

I was bad. I was bad for Elena. I had already been convicted of murder and I had nothing whatsoever to offer her. She wasn't just some chick I could never call again or some women I could shove out the door the next morning after sex. There was no room in my life for a woman like Elena. She deserved someone better. Someone like Stefan.

But when I saw Stefan and Elena together, I didn't know which feeling coursing through me was the strongest: anger or jealousy. Whatever it was, I had to do something about it. And as usual, being the reckless and impulsive Salvatore brother, I did the most stupid thing. I kissed Andie.

I'd never been attracted to Andie, though. She wasn't my type, in the least. Before I could even think about what I was doing, all the bitterness, all the anger, all the pent-up aggression gets channelled into pure lust. The need to devour something, to lose myself in something overwhelmed everything else and I dived in. To her. She could take my mind off Elena. At least for a while.

I heard her soft moan as I crushed her lips beneath mine. I swallowed it—the sound, the desire—taking it in and letting it feed the animal inside me. My tongue slipped easily into her mouth. She tasted sweet, like honey. She was going to make this way too easy for me.

But we never got that far. I was crazy – absolutely nuts – to use Andie to take my mind off Elena, to use her as some kind of replacement. With vast regret pounding through me, I straightened, wrenching my mouth away from hers. Andie froze for several beats, her hands still tangled in my hair. But something caught my attention. My heart stopped. Elena. Her eyes were wide with shock, followed by horror and then disgust. I felt like slapping myself hard. I was truly a bastard.

Guilt plagued me. What the hell had I done? I was really a jerk for kissing Andie, especially when I was not interested at all. What was I trying to achieve? To prove to myself that I could take my mind off Elena? Bravo, Damon! Now I had a disarray to deal with. My plan was to avoid Andie until hell froze over. I was steering clear of all women at the moment. Trust me, it's in the best interest of women everywhere.

I managed to avoid Andie for a few weeks. I did regret kissing her and I didn't have a clue what to do about it. I had no desire to get involved with a woman, especially not a woman like Andie. Not saying that she wasn't attractive. She was Elena's friend. It would be complicated and I didn't like the word 'complicated'.

x x x

I walked through the back door of the kitchen and slowly made my way to the rubbish area. It had been a busy week. At least it was Friday. I could sleep in late tomorrow. I didn't have to work at the Grill until Sunday mid-morning. Matt was concerned about the extra shifts I had been working at the Grill over the past few weeks. The sooner I could earn enough money to open my own café, the sooner I could leave Mystic Falls. I couldn't care how many hours I had to work. Elena was really messing with my mind. Getting out of Mystic Falls, as far away from Elena as possible was my goal. I didn't deserve her. She belonged to Stefan.

A scream echoed in the hospital car park located behind the cafeteria as I was carrying some boxes out to the trash. I stopped. Another scream. I dropped the boxes and ran towards the direction of the scream. A man clung tenaciously, his arms draped over a woman's shoulder. The woman tried to push him off her but he was too strong. I took another step closer. It was Elena.

Grabbing the man by the collar of his coat, I pulled him off Elena and flung him away.

"You bastard!" I growled as I crammed my fist into that man's face and he collapsed into a heap on the ground.

"Are you crazy?" Elena shouted as her hands hit me squarely on the shoulders, catching me by surprise and sending me flying backward, landing spread-eagle on the ground.

"What the hell was that for!?" I demanded, as I got up. Two securities chose to appear at the exact moment.

"This man is sick. It could be methanol poisoning. Get him to ER now!" Elena was already next to the man, with her hand on his wrist feeling his pulse.

Within a few minutes, the paramedics came rushing to the car park and the man was transferred to the ER for treatment. Elena insisted that I had an x-ray to make sure I didn't have a fracture from punching that man.

"No broken bones, lucky you." Elena walked into the treatment room holding an ice bag. "For your hand," she passed me an ice bag. "It will reduce the swelling on your knuckles."

"Thanks." When I grabbed the ice bag from her, her fingers brushed against mine. I was startled by the electricity generated by the brief contact. I quickly pulled away and stood up. "I'd better go now."

"I'm sorry."

I looked at Elena, puzzled.

"I shouldn't hit you so hard just now," she muttered.

I smiled. "It's okay. You were worried about a patient. I can understand that. I'm tough, remember?" I winked at her.

She rolled her eyes. "Trying to be a hero, uh? Where's your shining armour?"

I grinned. "I think I had left it in my dryer this morning," I said proudly. "You know I need to keep it shining all the time."

We both burst out laughing and it was several minutes before our laughter was spent. Elena was still chuckling as she took a bottle out of the pocket of her white coat, "You will still need some painkillers for your hand."

"Call me tomorrow if the swelling is bad or you are in severe pain," she said as she gently stroke her fingers over my bruised knuckles. "You probably should take a day or two off work."

The combination of her caress and her gentleness made me uncomfortably warm and I forced myself to pull my hand from hers. Elena's brow furrowed.

'I guess I'd better be going. It's late." I hurried past her to get out of the treatment room.

"Damon!"

I jumped when I heard Elena's voice behind me. "Yes?"

"Your painkillers," she handed the bottle of pills to me. "Remember to take them with food."

I nodded as I took the bottle. What was wrong with me? I couldn't even speak properly in front of Elena.

"I…I'm thinking of grabbing a bite on my way home. Have you eaten?" she asked and smiled sheepishly, "maybe we can grab something to eat….together?"

The temptation to accept was so strong. "I…uh…there is a place which serves good burgers and fries just around the corner. Have you tried it?"

She grinned. "Sounds delicious. I'll drive since your hand is injured."

I held my palms up and shrugged helplessly. "Whatever. I'm your patient now."

The burger place was almost empty by the time we arrived. I guided Elena into a booth and slid across the other side. "What will you have?"

"I'm buying," she said.

"No, I'm buying," I countered.

She laughed. "No way, I'm buying. You are my patient. Just follow instruction."

"Okay, okay," I raised both my hands up and winked at her, "I don't argue with girls. I always give in. I'm easy like that."

Elena made a face at me and I laughed. It felt so comfortable, I thought.

We ordered two beef burgers, fries with ketchup and fried onions along with two large Diet Coke.

"I like a girl who eats," I said, grinning.

"Are you trying to say I eat like a pig?" she folded her arms across her chest.

"No, I just mean...well, forget it," I shrugged helplessly.

Elena looked at me for a while and then grinned, "Come on, I'm just pulling your legs."

I smiled. This woman in front of me was intriguing. I wanted to know more about her, but I didn't dare to ask.

The waiter marched over and dropped our orders on the table. We ate in silence for a while before I finally opened my mouth. "So, how is it like to be a surgeon?"

"Long hours in the OR i.e. operating room and long hours of study," she replied and took another bite of her burger. "And how is it like to be a chef?" she asked.

"Long hours in the kitchen but no time for eating."

She laughed. I really liked Elena. She knew how to laugh. It was sexy like hell.

"Come on, what? You don't like pickles? What's wrong with you?" I took the pickles from her plate and put them in my mouth. "You are a doctor, you shouldn't be so choosy in your food," I smirked.

"Yeah, right. I'm choosy, so are you. You haven't even touched the fried onions," she retorted.

'I don't like fried onions."

"But why did you order them if you don't like them?"

"Because you like them," I replied, immediately thinking, _Oh no! Why did I say that?_

Her eyes widened but within a fraction of second, a smile appeared on her face. "Do you plan to stay in Mystic Falls? I mean permanently."

"I want to have my own café eventually," I took a sip of my drink.

"Here at Mystic Falls?"

"I don't know. New York, Chicago or LA, maybe," I paused. "What about you? Do you intend to stay here?"

"I'm not sure," she paused. "Sometimes I don't know what I want."

"Well, that's not true. You want what everybody wants."

Elena leaned across the table. "So, Damon, tell me. What is it that I want?"

I hesitated for a moment, then plunged right in. "You want a love that consumes you. You want passion, an adventure, and even a little danger."

She kept quiet for several beats before she finally spoke, "I think we should go."

"Sure."

When we reached Elena's SUV, she turned around and touched the sleeve of my jacket. "I hope you will have your own café one day. I hope things work out the way you want. I want you to be happy, Damon."

She sounded sincere and I was touched. Impulsively I reached out and touched her cheek gently. "I want you to get everything that you're looking for as well."


	9. Chapter 9

**Elena**

I felt sorry for stringing Stefan along. I should have figured out what I wanted and just been honest about it. Stefan cared about me. I knew it and I was very grateful to have someone so wonderful like him who appreciated who I was and what I stood for.

Caroline insisted I had to get a date to go to the annual medical association ball. Stefan would be the perfect date. I couldn't tell Caroline or Stefan that I wanted to go to the ball with Damon. Deep inside I hated myself for not being honest enough to tell Stefan about how I felt about him. I didn't want to hurt him.

The problem was Damon. When I was with him, he just consumed me. Damon smelled trouble. I should stay away from him. But I also knew, deep down in some unearthed part of me that I couldn't. I was drawn to him like I was drawn to water or air. There was no denying the attraction I felt for Damon Salvatore. And somehow I'd thought it was the same for him, maybe just a little bit.

The last conversation I'd had with him flitted through my mind. _You want a love that consumes you. You want passion, an adventure, and even a little danger._

Being with him made me felt so alive. Like everything was possible. I couldn't wipe the stupid grin off my face when I remembered how he came to my rescue the other night as he thought I was being attacked. He'd make a perfect knight in shining armour. I wanted to know more about him, but I knew I shouldn't push him. Sometimes I felt he resisted the help, the emotion of other people. He was like a loner, stranded on an island of anger and bitterness that needed rescuing. He just didn't know it yet. Yes, I realised he might be trouble but it wouldn't keep me away from him. Nothing would.

x x x

"I thought you don't cook."

At the sound of the male voice directly behind me, I jumped. I dropped the package of frozen pizza back onto the stack, straightened and turned away from the supermarket's large, glass-walled freezer.

Damon stood in the aisle. Dressed in a black leather coat, black pants, a black shirt and black boots, he certainly stood out there in the grocery store aisle. I swallowed, hard. He was gorgeous. Incredibly gorgeous.

"Sorry," he said, managing to look both amused and apologetic at the same time. "Didn't mean to startle you."

"Well, you did," I said as I picked up the package of frozen pizza again and dropped it into my shopping cart.

"Don't tell me you are going to eat this." Damon made a face as he grabbed the package of frozen pizza from my cart.

"What's wrong with this?" I snatched it back from him. Sometimes Damon could be annoying, very annoying.

"Taste like cardboard. I won't eat it if I were you," he shrugged.

"Jenna and her boyfriend have gone away for the weekend. I want a quick meal. I prefer to spend more time on my books than cooking in the kitchen."

Damon said nothing for a moment. He grabbed the package of frozen pizza from my cart and put it back into the freezer.

'Damon…"

"Got an idea," he said after a while.

"I'm listening."

"Why don't I cook for you at your place? Then you can concentrate on your books."

My eyes widened in astonishment. "You want to cook for me?"

"Got any better idea?"

I contemplated that for a moment. Then I gently cleared my throat. "Okay. A proper dinner sounds good."

"Let's get some real food then," Damon said as he pushed my cart along.

I smiled as I walked beside him. I couldn't deny the fact that I actually liked the idea of Damon cooking dinner for me at my place.

Carrying a bottle of beer, I headed into the living room, where we had been sitting after dinner. I lowered myself into the sofa next to Damon and handed the bottle of beer to him.

"Thanks," he smiled.

"I should be the one who says thank you," I said softly. "Dinner was lovely." I thought about the macaroni salad loaded with fresh avocado and smoked bacon tossed in a lemon-thyme dressing and the pan seared salmon with avocado remoulade we just had. A taste of heaven.

"You know what they say; a way to a man's heart is through his stomach." He took a swallow of beer from the bottle. "Maybe you need to learn to cook."

"You think so?" I turned to face him and found myself staring into the eyes of the first man who had brought my blood to a rolling boil since Liam Davis. No, I corrected. Liam had never made me feel as if my body had all the rigidity of cooked spaghetti and as if my head was filled with helium. I was very conscious of Damon sitting so close, not more than a few inches away. My heart began to pound ferociously. Damon's face moved closer to mine, I stared at his mouth, full and tempting.

 _He's going to kiss me._

I held my breath in anticipation of a repeat wild rush of desire I had experienced the last time Damon had kissed me. His warm breath heated my skin. I was willing to surrender to this man in front of me, right here, right now.

The sudden sound of my phone ringing made both of us sprang apart like two teenagers caught necking in the back of the classroom. I reached into my jeans pocket for my cell phone. I looked at the caller ID. It was Stefan.

With a swift intake of breath, I punched the talk button and jammed the phone to my ear. "Stefan?"

Damon went very still.

"Hi Elena, I'm just wondering whether you would be keen to have brunch tomorrow at the Grill. We can do some studying together after that."

"I, uh, I have some family stuff tomorrow," I lied. "Maybe next time?"

"Oh, okay, maybe next time. Good night." Stefan's disappointment was apparent. I felt so guilty. _You are such a horrible person, Elena Gilbert!_

"Good night."

"What's going on between you and Stefan?"

I looked at Damon, startled at first, then my brows came together. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me," he said, his voice brusque.

As he watched, I drew in a deep breath. "Stefan and I are friends." I got up from the sofa and turned to face him. "There is nothing going on between us."

"Why did you lie?" His eyes narrowed. "Your aunt is away this weekend. You are alone by yourself."

I was taken aback. I didn't expect that. "Not that it's any of your business."

"Why did you lie Elena?" Damon stood up, his face closed to mine and his eyes staring at me. I took a step back.

"I don't know, okay?" I glared.

For what seemed like an eternity he just stood there, staring at me. His silence confused me. What did he expect me to say? I took another breath then bit down on my lip. He shook his head and gave a deep sigh, "You shouldn't lie to him. Stefan's a good guy."

I said nothing.

He took another swallow of beer. "You will be happy with him."

I raised my eyebrows. "I beg your pardon?"

He shook his head again. "It's late. I better get going. Good night Elena."

"Damon…" I began, but he had already slipped outside and closed the door softly behind him, leaving me alone with a mixture of confusion and distress.


	10. Chapter 10

**Damon**

I watched Giuseppe Salvatore picked up his coffee cup and swallowed meditatively. "Stefan told me you are working here."

"uh-huh."

He put down his coffee and exhaled slowly. "How have you been, son?"

"I'm alive. Fine." I answered. "Why are you here?"

"To see my son."

I frowned at him for a long, considering moment. "Why are you here, Dad?" I asked.

His smile was sad. "Stop running Damon."

Animosity and anger swelled inside me. "Look, I don't need your lecture. I don't need anyone to keep me in check."

He sighed. "Don't blame yourself Damon…"

"Stop, just stop!" I yelled as I stood up, knocking the chair down. "I killed Klaus and even until now I still want him dead. He deserved to die!" My voice was choked with outrage. "I know I have let you down, I'm a disgrace to the family."

Giuseppe's face wrinkled into a cringe. "Klaus attacked you. It was self-defence…"

"Stop defending me!" I howled. "My hands are covered with blood. They will always be."

Giuseppe said nothing.

I drew in a deep breath then shook my head "I'm not Stefan. I can't be him." I paused before I continued. "It's better for you not to have anything to do with me." I stepped back and away from my father. "Sorry," I said hoarsely. The pain inside my chest was excruciating.

As I turned to walk away, I saw Elena standing at the doorway of the staff cafeteria. A single glance at her expression was enough to tell me that she had heard the conversation. Dammit! I cursed silently. I didn't need this. All I could do was just kept on walking.

My anger and frustration were still not under control by the time I got inside my car. Every muscle in my body was tense and my fists were clenched. The desire to lash out, to hurt the people who hurt me rose up to choke me. I slammed my fist against the steering wheel in frustration. I had to get out of here.

The passenger door opened when I turned the key in the ignition and put my car in gear. Elena climbed inside.

"What the hell are you doing?" I narrowed my eyes.

"You are upset and hurt. You aren't fit to drive like this. I'm not going to let you kill yourself."

I blinked. "What? I'm not fit to drive?"

"Yes, you can't drive in a state like this," she folded her arms across her chest. "I won't let you."

"For goodness sake!" I hissed. "Get out of my car Elena!"

"No." Elena said firmly. She wasn't going to back off.

"Get out Elena," I warned her, "before I do something we will both regret later."

"No, I will not!" She fairly screamed and thrust her face forward, raised a hand, and stabbed a finger at my chest. "You will get yourself kill if you drive like this and I am not allowing this to happen. Do you hear me Damon Salvatore?"

We faced each other like wild, raging bulls. Our chests heaved, our nostrils flared, our anger consumed us.

Finally, I sat back in my seat with a heavy sigh. A short silence fell.

"I killed someone when I was seventeen."

What a way to just blurt it out there, idiot! I didn't know why I feel so compelled to tell Elena all my dirty little secrets, but I did. After what felt like a freaking eternity of silence, I turned to face her. Her brown-doe eyes, dark in the dim light, were focused sharply on mine. There was no judgment, disdain or horror. Curiosity, maybe a little pity.

"What? No running away, screaming?" I said, unable to keep the trace of bitterness from my voice.

She surprised me by reaching out to hold my hand in hers. "Wanna talk about it?"

There was a short silence.

"Start at the beginning," she said softly. "What happened?"

Dragging in a deep breath of air, I recited the events of the night Klaus Mikaelson was killed. I told her about the rivalry between Klaus and me, about my relationship with Katherine, and about how Klaus had caused Katherine to kill herself.

"I found her lying in her own pool of blood. Katherine was dead," my voice cracked and tears blurred my vision. "Klaus killed her."

In an instant, Elena moved closer and wrapped her arms around me. Suddenly, I could no longer stay immune to Elena. I closed my arms around her and held her so hard. Burying my head against the crook of her neck, I clung to her as if she were the only person who could save me.

Moving her fingers through my hair, she whispered, "It's alright, Damon. It's alright now. I'm here…"

I didn't know how long I held Elena. Eventually, raising my head, I reluctantly released her. I wiped my tears and straightened. Just the tender expression on Elena's face nearly drove me to kiss her senseless. Yet, in spite of my own pain, I realised I had broken my own commandment and promise to keep her at arm's length. She belonged to Stefan. Brother's girl and all.

"I…I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…" my voice cracked.

"No, it was alright, Damon," she whispered, touching my slumped shoulder.

Grimacing, I turned away. If I didn't, I was going to do the unthinkable: take Elena to the backseat and make frantic love with her. "I will drop you home."

Silence sizzled through the car's interior during the drive to Elena's house. I gave her a sideway look. I couldn't remember the last time I had cried. When Katherine died? I had been so completely humiliated at breaking down in front of Elena. What was wrong with me? I gripped my fingers tight around the wheel. I couldn't lose control anymore.

"Are you going to be okay?" Elena asked when I stopped the car in front of her driveway.

"Fine." I kept my eyes on the road ahead.

"Damon, you don't have to hide in front of me," she reached out and touched my hand. "You can trust me."

"Why are you still here?" I turned my head to glare at her. "I'm bad, Elena. Why wouldn't you run away from me as far as humanly possible?"

Elena held her breath as I stared at her. "Because I can't."

Abruptly the mood shifted. I raised my hands and folded them around the nape of her neck. My thumbs moved gently just behind her ears. I eased her head back slightly and lowered my mouth to hers. Even as my mouth descended to touch hers, I cursed myself for my weakness. I knew damn well I shouldn't be doing this. Elena deserved someone better, someone like Stefan. I didn't give myself a chance to argue. My mouth met hers like a hawk finding its nest and excitement sparked along every nerve ending. The effect was not unlike touching a match to extremely dry kindling. The flames erupted without warning, fierce and intense.

My fingers caught and tangled in that sleek cascade of hair. The contrast of silk against the roughness of my skin was so sensual, so unbelievably erotic, it ignited fireworks of need in my whole body. I knew I should have stopped the kiss right then, but the feel of her mouth was too enticing, too welcoming, and I was dying of thirst. I couldn't resist teasing my tongue ever so gently at the corners of her lips. She drew in a sharp, ragged breath at the soft contact but she didn't pull away. Instead, her lips parted ever so slightly, just wide enough to allow my tongue to slip inside.

With a rough growl, I deepened the kiss. Elena's hands slip up my chest to encircle my neck, holding me even closer. The movement flattened her breast against mine. The tantalizing, seductive sensation, combined with the hot tangling of our mouths, nearly sent me over the edge.

Things were moving swiftly. Much too swiftly. There was no room in my life for goodness, for someone like Elena. The thought was like a bucket of cold water on my face, jerking me back to my senses. I had to get a hold of myself.

"You need to go," I pulled away from Elena.

Her eyes flew open and I saw the look on her face. It was a mixture of confusion and bewilderment and I knew I was the one who had put it there. I felt like a cad. _What an asshole you are, Damon Salvatore!_

"Damon…"

I didn't let her finish. "Whatever you were going to say, we both know this was a mistake that can't happen again."

Elena went very still. "Mistake?"

"Yes, mistake. This was a mistake," I said gruffly.

She stared at me, momentarily speechless.

"Are you just going to pretend it never happened?" she asked eventually, her voice trembling.

I said nothing.

"You can go to hell, Damon."

She yanked open the car door and climbed out. The passenger door closed with a thud.


	11. Chapter 11

**Elena**

 _We both know this was a mistake that can't happen again._

A mistake? That really made me felt so much better! I cursed Damon. How dare he said it was a mistake? He wanted me. I could feel it in the way he held me. What happened between us was not a mistake.

I thought about my conversation with Damon. _I'm bad, Elena. Why wouldn't you run away from me as far as humanly possible?_

The note in his voice sounded very much as though he was issuing a warning. As if I needed a warning. Everyone had a past. I didn't care about Damon's past. I just wanted to be with him. That's all that mattered to me. And then I knew.

I loved Damon Salvatore. I was in love with Damon.

When had it happened? I didn't know. All I knew was that I loved him and that should he not remain a part of my life, it would become a vacuum, a dark void.

x x x

I put the finishing touch on my makeup and stepped back to check my full reflection in my bedroom mirror. The strapless crimson gown I had chosen, with a sweetheart neckline, had been on sale and was just right for tonight. The floor-length gown featured a full skirt that really complimented my svelte frame. My curls were pulled slightly off my face and I did feel an added streak of confidence when I studied my reflection.

After what happened between Damon and me the other day, I didn't feel like going to the ball. Caroline had been harassing me about not turning up and I couldn't make up an excuse for not showing up. Maybe the ball could take my mind off Damon for a while.

The doorbell sounded. Quickly, I grabbed my small, beaded evening purse and headed for the front door. I opened the door and involuntarily caught my breath at the sight of Stefan in his black suit. He did look magnificent in it. I wondered how Damon would look in a suit or tuxedo. I couldn't help but wish it was Damon standing on my doorstep, and not his brother.

Stefan whistled long and low as he came through the door. "Wow! You look stunning."

I smiled. "Thank you. You look nice in a suit."

"Shall we get in the car?" Stefan asked as he extended his hand.

"Sure, let's go." I took his hand and we made our way out of my house.

When we entered the ballroom, I felt as if I had stepped into a fairy tale. The ballroom glittered with tiny white lights and resounded with the voices of fashionably attired guests milling about or gliding around the dance floor to the twenty-piece orchestra. I should feel excited but I didn't. In fact, a wave of sadness washed over me because Damon was not here.

"Are you okay?" Stefan touched my arm. "You don't look well."

"I'm okay," I forced a smile. "Just need a drink."

"I will get you a drink." He hurried off and disappeared into the crowd around the bar that had been set up at the far end of the room.

"Elena," Caroline's voice came from directly behind me. I swung around to find her standing beside Tyler Lockwood. Caroline was dressed in an emerald evening gown, her blonde hair swept up in curls on the top of her head.

"You look amazing tonight," I smiled at my friend.

"So are you. Where's Stefan?" She glanced around the ballroom quickly. "He shouldn't leave you alone. He is your date."

"A man should never leave a beautiful girlfriend like you alone," Tyler chuckled, "looks like Stefan needs to learn a few tricks about dating."

"Stefan and I are friends. We aren't dating." Why was I so eager to make sure they knew Stefan and I had no romantic connection? I didn't have time to delve for an answer.

"Come on Elena," Caroline smiled sweetly, "this is a date, isn't it?"

I rolled my eyes. Stefan came back with two glasses of white wine. Both Caroline and Tyler decided to stepped onto the dance floor. I took a sip of the wine from my glass and looked around, admiring the designer gowns and expensive jewels.

"Would you dance with me, Elena?" Stefan invited, setting his emptied glass on the table.

"Sure."

Whisking me into his arms, Stefan led me into a slow, effortless dance. His hands settled on my back and he kept me close. I closed my eyes. The scene reminded me of when I danced with Damon at the Wire Fire Club. I wanted to dance with Damon tonight. God, I missed him so much.

"Are you sure you are okay?"

I opened my eyes and found Stefan staring at me looking concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, offering him a weak smile. I wasn't fine. How could I? Love was absurd. One minute, your heart sang and you were in cloud nine. The next, you might find yourself riddled with regrets.

No! Not this time.

Whatever happened between Damon and I, I decided fiercely, there wouldn't be any regrets. I might not have a clue if or when we would pick up where we had left, but I knew this was real. When it was real, you couldn't run away from it.

It was almost midnight when we returned to my house. Stefan got out, walked around the car and opened my door. I climbed out of the car and Stefan walked me to the front porch.

"I had a lovely time, Elena." Stefan smiled brightly.

"Yes, I had a pleasant night," I lied.

"Any chance you would be interested in going out with me again? As in a date?" Stefan asked.

"Stefan…." What could I say? _Sorry, I'm in love with your brother. You don't stand a chance, buddy._

"I know…we've only known each other for a short while but I've never met a woman quite like you. I look at you and I see an angel. I touch your skin and my entire body ignites. I kiss you and I know that I'm falling in love," Stefan said and he dipped his head to brush his mouth very quickly against my cheek. "I'm in love with you, Elena."

I gasped and stepped back. "There's so much you don't know about me, Stefan."

"More to learn and love."

"Good night Stefan." I covered the awkward moment by hurrying up the rest of the front steps.

"Have I upset you?" Stefan asked.

"No, you haven't upset me, you've just surprised me," I answered as I dig out the key from my purse. "Good night."

My hand trembled slightly as I unlocked the door. When I finally got into the house, I turned to look back at Stefan. He was still standing there, watching. I raised one hand in farewell and then quickly closed the door. Sometime later I heard the muted purr of his car's engine receded into the distance. I pulled the curtain aside and peered out into the dark to make sure Stefan had definitely gone. When I was about to turn back to my bedroom, I caught sight of a shadow standing behind a tree opposite my house. It was a shadow of a man.

"What in the world?"

I gripped the window ledge and peered more closely at the shadow. A closer look verified my first impression. It was Damon. Without hesitation, I opened the door and stepped outside. I went down the steps and ran across the street. There were no signs of Damon. He was gone.


	12. Chapter 12

**Damon**

"You've been dodging my calls." Stefan stood outside of my apartment, looking annoyed.

I sighed. "Yeah, well, I have been busy." I took a sip of the bourbon from the glass I had brought from the kitchen. "What's up, brother?"

"Busy is a lame excuse and you know it." Stefan glided, uninvited, through the opening into my apartment.

I closed the door and leaned back against it. "Just can't stay away, can you?"

"Why do I have this feeling that you are trying to avoid me?" Stefan narrowed his eyes.

"Tell me. Why am I avoiding you?" I asked coolly as I sat on the sofa.

"I heard about what happened between you and dad that day in the cafeteria." He said eventually.

"We went through this, Stefan." My temper kicked in. "I don't want to see him. I can't see him, don't you understand?"

"You still blame yourself."

I stood abruptly, thrusting a tight fist against the wall in my living room. "Hell, yes. I had let him down. Gods know how much money he had spent in order for the lawyers to plea-bargain for a manslaughter charge so that I could avoid a murder conviction. Not only dad, I had let mum down as well. I don't deserve their forgiveness."

"Don't say that, Damon." He reached out and touched my hand but I jerked away. "You are family and you will always be."

I rubbed my hand along the back of my neck. I didn't need this. Not now.

"Stefan, face reality, I'm bad, I'm not the good guy. I can't be saved!" I growled to Stefan.

"That's not true!" he roared. "I know you Damon. No matter what happens, we stick together. You and I."

I was silent for a moment, and I could almost swear that I could see tears in Stefan's eyes. Dammit, I wanted to hang on to my brother with every ounce of my strength. "I know," I finally said. "You will always be my brother, no matter what happens."

Stefan smiled faintly. "Guess you won't mind getting your brother a drink?"

I took a bottle of beer from the kitchen and handed it to him. We sat in companionable silence for a few minutes.

"I told her," Stefan said eventually. "Finally."

My jaw tightened. I took another swallow of the bourbon. "What did she say?"

Remembering Stefan kissing Elena at her front porch made my stomach hurt. Because of the angle of where I stood, I couldn't see where his kiss landed or how much Elena participated, but it caused all the muscles in my body to bunch. God, this was torture.

 _It was a mistake._ Why did I say something like that? I was digging a hole so deep and I had no idea how to get out. Elena and I had too much unfinished business between us. Like the way she responded to my kiss, for starters. I could not recall the last time a woman had shivered in my arms like this. I didn't understand how she'd gotten to me this way. I couldn't love her. Hell, I didn't know her that long. I wanted her for sure. What man wouldn't want a vibrant, seductive woman like Elena? But mere wanting shouldn't cause the irreversible need that seemed to have lodged square in the middle of my chest. I needed to figure out what was going on. And I saw Stefan kissed Elena. What kind of sick joke was this?

"She hasn't say anything yet," Stefan glanced down at his clasped hands and then looked up. "She said she was surprised, that's all."

"Mmm."

"Do you think I should give her some time?"

I stabbed a hand through my hair. This was harder than I had expected. "Follow your heart brother. Do whatever you think is right." My voice sounded strained.

"Don't you think it's about time you got married?" he said.

I felt as if I'd been hit in the head with a ball peen hammer. It took me several seconds to recover.

"Married?" I finally managed. "Are you out of your mind? I'm an ex-convict. Who's going to marry an ex-convict?"

"Trust me, if she loves you, she will accept everything of you." Stefan gave me a pat on the shoulder.

Would Elena accept everything of me? Was it possible for her to accept my past?

x x x

It was nearly midnight when I finally left the Grill. I was inordinately tired. I had worked continuously for the last one week without a break. A few staffs in the hospital cafeteria were out sick with the flu and so were a few from the Grill. Matt was concerned I was getting the flu when he spotted me taking some aspirin for headache.

"I am not getting the flu," I told him. "I never get sick. I will stick to my working schedule."

I ran a hand around the back of my neck, absently massaging the aching muscles. The headache that had been only a minor, nagging discomfort this morning was beginning to pound. It didn't help after bumping into Elena in the hospital pharmacy while I was still trying to figure out how to take up where we left off. She looked worried when she saw me buying some pills from the counter. "I do not have the flu," I enunciated tightly when she showed her concern. "I have a common, garden-variety headache." She stiffened at my tone, turned on her heel, and marched out of the pharmacy.

I couldn't care less now. All I wanted now was my bed. Then I saw a figure leaning against the wall outside of my apartment. I decided I was definitely hallucinating. Or else I was dreaming. Possibly, I was dying in my bed. I didn't know which of the three it was, but I did know that the chills that had racked my body were coming with alarming frequency now. The apparition looked like Elena.

"Damon."

It was Elena.

"What are you doing here?" I slid my key into the front-door lock.

"You don't look well. Are you sick?"

"I told you I don't have the flu." I opened the door, reached around the edge of the door and flipped a light switch.

"May I come in?" she asked.

Too ill to march her back to her car or to argue with her about leaving, I straightened, stepped back from the doorway, and rudely turned my back, leaving her to follow me inside.

"Look, I'm exhausted. I have worked non-stop this week. Can we talk some other time?"

"You are sick. You need to see a doctor."

"No, I'm not!" I exploded, then almost keeled over from the stabbing pain in my head. The room reeled, and I put my hand against the wall, trying to steady myself.

"You are ill," she burst out, running toward me. She reached for my arm and I jerked it away, but not before she felt the fiery heat of my skin. "My God, you're burning up!"

"Go home, Elena." My head swam and my stomach churned as I turned on my heel and started toward my room. "I'm going to bed."

"Let me help you. Lean on me," she commanded, and I didn't have the strength to stop her from picking up my arm and draping it over her shoulders.

When Elena got me to my bedroom, I staggered forward and collapsed on the bed. I felt the bed sink as she sat down beside me, and I actually imagined her fingertips gently smoothing the hair off my forehead. I was obviously very close to delirium, and the whole scene that I saw behind my eyes was taking on the quality of a dream: Elena hovering frantically over me, touching my forehead, smoothing my hair back.

"Damon," she asked. "Have you taken the pills from the pharmacy?"

I nodded. "I am not dying." My mouth quirked in a fevered smile.

"I think you should go to the hospital."

"I need a woman's touch."

Elena's mouth fell open. I couldn't stop myself anymore. I wanted her so badly I hurt with it. I wanted her tonight, I wanted her now. So I reached for her. Using all the strength left inside, I sat up, closed my hands around her shoulders and hauled her up against my chest. "Stay."

"Uh, Damon, you are sick, maybe I should call an ambulance…"

"Yeah. Maybe."

I covered her mouth with my own. She made a soft, muffled sound, and then her arms closed tightly around me and she was kissing me back. I really, really didn't want to stop because she tasted so good and it would kill me if I pulled the plug now. Nothing could stop me as long as I knew that Elena wanted me as badly as I wanted her. She mumbled something against my mouth as I slipped the blouse off her shoulders. I did not catch the precise words, but I had no trouble at all understanding the meaning. She was as swept up in the moment as I was.

She removed my T-shirt and spread her palms across my chest. "I love the feel of you," she whispered.

I was already hard, but her touch and the sultry desire in her words made me absolutely rigid. It took exactly the same amount of time for both of us to realise we had to get ourselves out of our clothes. In a flurry of arms and legs and bumping heads, we shed our shoes, pants and underwear. Then I grabbed her around the waist and fell back across the white bedspread with her.

"My God," I muttered against her throat. "Do you have any idea how much I want you?"

"Don't stop." Her own voice was muffled because she was frantically kissing my jaw. "Don't stop Damon."

What red blooded, American male would turn down a dead sexy, beautiful naked woman that asked you to please do it to her? Not me, no way, so I kissed her again, let my tongue slid against hers and lifted her leg up over my hip. She kissed me back on a soft gasp as I started to slide in. She was tight, hot and wet. She whispered my name across my neck and arched her back. Her nails dug into my shoulders as I lifted her up a little bit and tried to push all the way in. She closed around me and took me deeper still, straight down into uncharted depths and unknowable waters. I held her tightly when the world finally exploded in a sharp burst of vivid light and colour, then I thrust into her one last time with a harsh, exultant growl while I found my own pleasure.


	13. Chapter 13

**Elena**

When I next opened my eyes, I could see streaks of daylight peeking beneath the edge of the curtains. I listened to the sounds around me. Damon's breathing was deep and even where it fanned the side of my neck. I smiled when I felt his hard body pressed against my back. Memories of the night before clung to my mind like persistent cobwebs. A feeling of peace and contentment enveloped me after knowing that he wanted me as much as I wanted him. I lay there staring at the window, remembering the touch of his hand and the warmth of his lips.

An idea hit me, so I moved slowly away from Damon and slipped out of the bed. I put on his T-shirt and then padded barefoot into the kitchen. I was pleased to see that Damon kept the fridge stocked. Pulling eggs from the cubby inside the door, I open the freezer, too, taking out sausage patties and hash browns and laying it all on the counter. I grabbed a bowl and three skillets of varying sizes from the cabinet and set them on the stove. Looking proudly at my progress thus far, I started making breakfast. I didn't cook usually but it was never too late to start.

My attention was on the omelette I had just slid onto one of the plates on the counter when I heard a throat cleared behind me. I turned around with a big smile in place but my smile froze. Damon's expression said it all. He was having second thoughts. About last night. About us.

Anger stirred deep inside me, dissolving much of the warm afterglow that had enveloped me. "I'm making omelette," I said, trying hard to control my anger as I turned back to the food. "If you want something light, I can fix it for you. You should eat something before you take the medication."

"Elena, about last night…"

I whirled to face him. "Don't act like nothing had happened last night. Don't you dare saying that last night was just sex or lust." My outrage erupted. "There is something going on between the two of us and you know it."

"You know something?" he said through his teeth. "You are driving me crazy, Elena. I want you so badly I hurt all over and yet…" He stopped.

"Because of Stefan."

He stilled.

I raised my chin. "Or because you had spent the last thirteen years in jail?"

"Damn it Elena," he cursed. He was annoyed now. "I killed somebody. I was in jail. I'm bad. I'm bad for you Elena."

"Will you stop saying that!?" I cried out. "Seriously I don't care! I don't give a damn what people think."

"But I care!" He yelled back. "I'm not the good guy, remember? I'm the selfish one. I take what I want. I do what I want. I lie to my brother, I fall in love with his girl, and I don't do the right thing. You deserve someone better than me," his voice cracked. "Someone like Stefan."

I stared into the fiery, furious depths of his eyes and still, despite the risks I knew lurked within them, within him, I couldn't bring myself to walk away. To distance myself from him. I couldn't.

I took one of his hands and entwined my fingers with his. "I care about you, Damon," I murmured. _I love you_ hovered on my tongue, but I couldn't say it. I knew he wouldn't want it, that it would make him feel uncomfortable. I had to take this slowly. "I know why you push me away. You think you don't deserve me but you are wrong. I hate not being near you. I…."

"Oh, for God's sake!" he exploded, pulling himself away. "What is wrong with you? Can't you see I don't want you?"

Fury blazed in my eyes, and I clenched my hands into fists, fighting back tears and the simultaneous urge to slap him. "Fine," I retorted, trying valiantly to hold on to my shattered dignity. "You can make your own damned breakfast and eat it alone." Turning on my heel, I walked out of the kitchen.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he demanded.

"It means I think you're rotten company!"

"But you still slept with me."

I reached my hand up and slapped him hard across the face. He was shocked from the sting of it and brought his hand up to his cheek.

I glared at him with tears in my eyes. "How dare you!? How dare you say something like that!?" I said, then cried out in shocked alarm when he grabbed my arm.

"Don't ever do that again," his voice turned icy cold and he tightened his grip on my arm.

I winced with pain from his death grip on my arm. That he was hurting me finally penetrated his anger, and he released me abruptly and stepped back. Pent-up breath was released in a great expulsion of air as the heels of his hands dug into his eyes.

When he looked at me again he said hoarsely. "Go home, Elena."

"Damon, please listen to me…"

He shook his head. "There is nothing more to say. Just leave."

I swallowed a sob that was rising in my chest and hastily gathered up my clothing before getting out of Damon's apartment. I glanced over my shoulder before I closed the door. Damon stood at the windows, his face expressionless.


	14. Chapter 14

**Damon**

I buried my face with both hands when I heard the door closed behind her. It was as though she had torn my heart from my chest and carried it with her, and I was standing here helplessly, bleeding out from the gaping wound. My legs felt weak and I dropped to the floor on my ass. "I'm sorry," I whispered hoarsely. Squeezing my eyes tightly shut to decrease the burning sensation beneath my eyelids from tears I refused to shed, I swallowed a sob rising in my chest. Sitting up, I wrapped my arms around my knees, fighting against the excruciating pain that I felt. Rocking harder, I opened my eyes, and the tears finally flowed. I swiped an arm across my eyes, cursing angrily as I roughly removed the droplets from my ravaged face, but they kept returning, and that only pissed me off more.

 _Stop crying, Damon Salvatore. You did the right thing by letting her go. Elena deserved someone better. You should be happy for her._

Easier said than done. The agony filling in my heart and soul was so strong.

Who was Damon Salvatore? A murderer. An ex-convict. A terrible son. A lying brother. Elena made me happy, she made me laugh, she made me whole, and the most important of all she made me felt I deserved to be loved. To be loved by her.

Unfortunately, I had been a coward. I was afraid to commit, afraid to admit what I wanted.

I had probably lost her forever now.

For the first time in my life, I was left with regrets. And it was excruciatingly painful.

x x x

The next week went by in a blur. I worked hard. I picked up a few extra shifts at the Grill and the hospital. I just wanted to work. Damned if I didn't get enough rest. I was too numb to feel the external elements, too devastated to care. I had to admit that sometimes there were no second chances. Every so often, something or someone extraordinary came along in life and there was only a small window of opportunity to snatch it and make it your own. And I completely blew it off.

It was a busy Saturday night at the Grill. The Mystic Falls football team had won a competition and the team was having a celebration here. The Grill was jammed with a writhing, sweating crowd. Caroline and Tyler were happily getting drunk and kissing. Some of the football players were snapping pictures with their fans and girls. The girls were screaming with laughter. Then I saw Elena sitting on the bar stool laughing hysterically at something Caroline said. One of the football players was leaning so close to her. Mr Football player was trying to get her attention by running a finger up and down her bare arm. And Elena didn't seem to mind at all. What was she thinking? She definitely had too much to drink.

When Mr Football player asked the bartender to get more drinks, I headed towards Elena and grabbed her arm. "I think you have enough tonight." I growled in her ears.

Elena lifted an eyebrow at me and flipped her hair over her shoulder. "I thought you don't care."

"Come on. We're leaving."

"No."

"I said we are leaving." I raised my voice.

"I'm not going with you." She shook my grip loose but practically fell off her stool. I reached out a hand to steady her while she grabbed the edge of the table. Both Caroline and Tyler burst into laughter.

"Elena, you are clearly drunk." Caroline giggled.

"No, I'm not," Elena retorted and made a face. She tried to climb to her feet but clearly was too drunk to do so as she grabbed onto my arms to stay upright. With a sigh she leaned into me and buried her nose in my throat. "You smell good," she muttered against my neck.

"Okay, time to go home." I locked my arm around her waist to keep her anchored to my chest and she wrapped both her arms up around my neck.

I had to half march, half carry Elena out the front door of the Grill. When we stepped out of the Grill, I moved her from my front to my side and secured her with an arm around her shoulders. She giggled as she hooked an arm around my waist and cuddled into my side.

"Why are you drunk and dressed all sexified tonight anyway?" My voice sounded irritated. I was annoyed.

"You think I look sexy?" Elena's eyes went huge.

We stopped in front of my car and I looked at her. Now with her looking at me all big eyed and swaying unsteadily I knew the right thing to do was send her on her way, but somehow I just couldn't walk away from her.

"Elena, every guy at the Grill was circling you like you were bait in the water during shark week. You know you look good, what I think shouldn't matter." I sighed.

"It matters and you know it," she whispered.

I sighed again. "Let's get you back home."

We drove to her house in complete silence. Elena was still quiet as we walked up the front steps to her house. She pushed the door open and paused to switch on the lights as I followed her inside before I closed the door behind me. She pushed her hand through her hair before turning to face me. I leaned against the door watching her and I swallowed. Hard. She looked so damn sexy even when she was drunk.

She blew out a breath and took a few unsteady steps towards me. I held my breath when she put a hand on my shoulder and one on the door beside my head. I knew I should move away but I couldn't.

"Do you really mean what you said?"

"What?" I could hardly speak properly because she was standing so close. Too close.

She moved a step closer to me. "You think I look sexy?" She sounded so sexy and sultry. My heart nearly stopped.

"Elena…" She planted her mouth solidly over mine before I could finish.

Elena tasted so sweet and tangy. She felt better than anything I could remember in my entire life and when her hands wrapped around my neck, I stopped thinking. I was pretty sure I had forgotten my own name.

Her fingers tangled in my hair and she sighed against my mouth. With a groan I deepened the kiss, my tongue teasing hers. She met me eagerly kiss for kiss, taste for taste, and didn't protest when I scooped her up into my arms. Then I carried her into the living room. There I put her down on the sofa and lowered myself on top of her. My lips went to her throat. Somewhere my conscious was whispering I should just put her to bed and go get a cold shower to get my libido back in check, but none of that was going to happen because her hands went right to my belt buckle.

"Elena." I put my hands on her shoulders and where I thought I was going to push her away my body betrayed me and I ended up getting my hands underneath her skirt. She pressed close to me, her hands making short work of the belt on my denims. Her lips fluttered over the pulse pounding rapidly at my throat.

"Stop thinking so hard." Her voice was all husky sweet and cloudy with desire while she tugged my shirt off over my head. I knew I had to stop. There was no way I would be able to live with myself if I let this get out of hand while she was drunk. Abruptly, I dropped my hands and pushed up off her.

She opened her eyes and tears welled up in her eyes. I knew she was going to cry and my heart twisted painfully in my chest.

"Don't cry."

"You don't want me."

"Don't want?" I exploded. My harsh voice was in complete opposition to the poignancy of my words. "I've wanted you every day of my godforsaken life."

Elena stared at me. "Really?" Her voice dropped to a shaken whisper.

"Yes," I brushed my lips over hers. "I want you. I want you so badly." I needed this. My mouth seized hers with fierce desperation and I groaned against her mouth. "God, I want you." And then my tongue plunged inside her. Our kiss turned into a wild animal mating. Her tongue caressed mine. My soft groan echoed in the warm cave of her mouth. I knew I was lost. For better or worse…


	15. Chapter 15

**Elena**

I woke the next morning with a throbbing headache and I realised I was in my bedroom. Then the memories of the night before came back – watching football with Caroline, celebration at the Grill and Damon. Damon brought me home. I kissed him. He kissed me back. Would he push me away again? Drawing in a deep breath, I rolled over to find Damon rose up on one elbow, watching me.

"Morning, sunshine." His voice was husky and seductive.

His blue eyes were sleepy behind those ridiculously thick black lashes. Dark stubble shadowed his cheeks and chin. His skin stretched smooth over bulging muscles. I swallowed hard. This man was magnificent.

With one finger, I traced a circle over his chest.

"You are here. Still here," I said softly.

"You don't want me here?" He raised his eyebrows.

Shaking my head, I leaned over and kissed his chest. Muscle and skin jumped my lips. "I don't want you to leave," I muttered against his chest.

His hand burrowed into my hair. With a tug that was more surprising than painful, he pulled my head back.

"Elena…"

"What?"

"You need to stop doing that." He leaned in closer, so close I could feel his heated breath on my cheek.

"Stop doing what?"

"Stop driving me crazy," he said in a low, husky voice against my ear, making me shiver.

"No," I answered honestly. Really, the way he said it made my whole body catch fire. "I won't stop driving you crazy. I want to make you want me every single second, every single minute."

"You are crazy, definitely crazy. But I like it," he whispered against my lips before his mouth closed over mine with a force that made me gasp into his mouth as he took it.

Damon didn't kiss—he ravaged—and I moaned as his mouth conquered mine, winding my arms around his neck. His tongue was relentless, entering and retreating. I speared my fingers through his hair, engulfed in a passion so fierce that I believed I would die if he didn't take me right here, right now.

"I think you're the sexiest woman on earth," Damon said against my throat, his voice rough and husky.

I needed to be taken by him, consumed by him, joined with him. Damon was the other half of my soul, and I wanted him now.

"I need you. I need you so much I can't stand it…" His mouth took mine, leaving me unable to finish the sentence that I needed to say.

He spread my legs apart and then rubbed his engorged member along my folds. I was so wet and hot. He grabbed my hips and thrust deep inside me in one quick motion. I cried out, as he filled me with his full length. Our tongues continued to mimic our lovemaking, tangling and thrusting into one another's mouths, as we both groaned out our intense pleasure. He began thrusting into me harder and faster. I gasped out loud and my mouth opened wide, releasing him. I threw my head back into the bed and cried out as my body started convulsing around him. I gripped him tightly, until I felt he drained every ounce of himself inside me and fell against my sweat slickened body. It was the most intense orgasm I had ever felt in my life. I was pretty sure Damon felt the same.

Finally, my breathing and heart rate calm, I murmured, "I love you, Damon."

Damon's lax body stiffened and he levered himself up on his elbow, and looked down at me.

"I just want you to know one thing," he said.

"What?"

"You know that what we've got is more than just a sexual thing." He drew his finger down the curve of my neck. 'I care about you, Elena."

I could see the fear in Damon's eyes. The fear of commitment. The fear of expectation. The fear of believing that he actually deserved to be loved. My heart ached for him. I reached out to touch his jaw gently.

He rolled onto his back, put one hand behind his head, and gazed up at the ceiling. "Can we take things one step at a time?"

I rose partway off the bed and leaned over him. "I just want to be with you. It's all I've ever wanted."

An hour later when I walked into the kitchen to join Damon, I could smell the exquisite aromas and my mouth was watering.

"Ah, French toast," I gazed at the golden-brown French toast on the frying pan. "Smells absolutely fantastic."

He grinned. "Thanks. Grab yourself a cup of coffee."

"Sure." I reached for the coffee pot and poured myself a cup.

"I thought you live with your aunt," Damon said as he arranged the French toast on two plates and carried the food to the table.

"Jenna is a journalist. She travels quite often with Logan i.e. her boyfriend who is a photographer. She is now in Brazil and won't be back until end of the month."

"So you will be living here by yourself until end of the month?"

"You are more than welcome to stay if you wish," I winked at him as I sat down. "I won't object to the idea."

Damon blinked. Then his mouth curved slowly into a grin. "Sounds like a very tempting offer. I shall consider it seriously."

"Yup. You should." I grinned before I picked up my fork and took a bite of the toast. "You know, when it comes to cooking, you are the master. You've got a real talent. Where did you learn to cook?"

"I used to watch my mum in the kitchen when I was a kid. I guess I just spend a lot of time fooling around in the kitchen."

I nodded and forked up another bite of toast. "I have hardly heard you talk about your mum."

"She's dead."

I nearly dropped my fork. "I'm sorry…"

"It's OK," he took a sip of his coffee before continuing. "She died when I was seven."

My mouth dropped. I winced at the thought of Damon losing his mother when he was only a little boy.

"What was she like?" I asked, searching his face.

"Beautiful, caring, just like you," he smiled as he leaned back on the chair. "And a very good cook."

"I'm sure she would be proud that her son has got the talent."

"Too bad Stefan hasn't had the chance to know her…" he paused. "She died when Stefan was born."

I blinked. "Oh Damon…" I reached out and held his hand.

We sat in silence for several moments before Damon finally spoke. "Elena, you are not going to like what I say next."

I took another sip of my coffee. My heart started to race. What if Damon wanted to push me away again? Could I survive another heart break?

"Stefan can't know about this, about us yet."

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. "Listen, Damon, he should know."

He sighed. "I know he should know. I just don't know when he should know it."

"Maybe we shouldn't…"

"No Elena. I don't want to hurt Stefan. Neither do you," he said softly with pleading in his eyes. "Please Elena. I promise I will talk to Stefan soon."

"Okay, okay. I don't want to argue." I turned my attention back to the toast.

"Hey," Damon was suddenly next to me, pulling me up from the chair, and his arm coming possessively around my waist. "I promise you I will figure this out."

I said nothing. I wanted to trust him. I wanted things to work out between us. Cupping the back of his head, I urged his lips to mine, desperate to feel his mouth locked with mine, his tongue thrusting, warming me as nothing else could. He responded immediately, his hands coming up to my head to hold it in place as he groaned into my mouth as he took it.

Finally, he moved his mouth from mine, leaving me nearly breathless. 'I promise you."


	16. Chapter 16

**Damon**

And that's how we handled it – as carefully and secretly as possible. As the weeks passed and we grabbed furtive meeting here and there, Elena began to show the strain of lying to her friends and family. She had become an expert at inventing elaborate excuses that wouldn't rouse their suspicions, but still it was tough.

I felt it too. It was hard to lie to Stefan. And I felt bad for Elena. She had to lie because of me. But I couldn't let go. I had fallen for Elena. I loved her. I needed more. I wanted to be as close to her as two people could get.

As the weather improved and spring took root Elena came up with the idea of spending a weekend at her family lake house. The Gilbert family lake house was a summer house owned by the Gilbert Family at Dunham Lake, located some distance away from Mystic Falls. The Gilberts spent many vacations there but not many friends were aware of how to get there. Elena thought it would be the ideal place for us to celebrate our three-month anniversary at the lake house as there would be no interruption. She wanted to make it special, festive.

Half an hour after we arrived the lake house, Elena was seated on a stool by the kitchen counter, completely relaxed, laughing because we couldn't decide what to do with our evening. "I'll make out a list," she teased, pulling a scratch pad and pencil closer to her. "So far, you've suggested making love." She wrote that down while I leaned over her and watched with a grin, my hand resting on her shoulder. "And making love. And making love."

"Did I only bring it up three times?" I joked when she finished writing.

"Yes, and I agreed all three times, but we were supposed to be thinking of ideas for the early part of the evening."

"But that's all I want to do." I put my hand on her shoulder and playfully nipped her ear. She laughed, then she tipped her head sideways and lightly rubbed her soft cheek against the top of my hand.

"It's a beautiful day. We shouldn't just stay in bed."

I thought for a moment and smiled suddenly. "What about a picnic near the lake? I will prepare a snack to take along"

"Great," she agreed at once. She glanced at her watch. "We can even have a swim."

"Sounds like a fantastic idea," I smiled.

Ten minutes later I bustled out of the house carrying a basket and retrieved a quilt from the back of my car and spread it out on the deep grass.

"By the looks of it, we could eat out of it for at least a week." Elena laughed as she spotted the basket.

'A picnic won't be a picnic without heaps of snacks," I said as opened the basket and reached inside. "Apple? Orange?" I asked, holding up the pieces of fruit for her inspection.

"I'll have a drink instead," she answered as she took out a can of Diet Coke.

I reclined, stretching out my legs and supporting myself on one elbow while I crunched into an apple. "How's work going?"

"Love it. It's challenging. Professor Tanner is a little strange but he is a great surgeon. What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Your café."

"Oh."

"You said you want your own café one day."

I shrugged. "That's the plan but it's not that simple."

"You are a great cook. You shouldn't doubt yourself, OK?" Elena covered my knee over her hand.

It was touching to know Elena thought so highly of my skills. Moving slowly, I cupped her head in my palms, my fingers entwined in her hair, and drew her face to mine. The lips that touched mine were warm, sweet and gentle. My arms went around her and pressed her into my body. My tongue circled her closed lips, and I nibbled at a corner of her mouth. I felt her mouth relaxing and she moaned, and accepted my ardent probing

When we were both breathless, I pulled my mouth from hers, but gave fervent attention to her ears. I kissed her eyelids.

"You are so damn beautiful." My whisper was deep and husky. I laid her down and came down on top of her.

"Damon, we are supposed to have a picnic," Elena whispered softly.

"I don't want to have a picnic," I leaned forward and told her in a husky voice near her ear, "I want you. Right now, right here."

"Then take me," she dared me, somehow knowing exactly what to say to push my buttons. "I'm all yours."

"Yes. Mine." I barely managed to whisper before my mouth descended on hers and Elena eagerly welcomed my kiss.

x x x

"Your blackberry bread and butter pudding is absolutely gorgeous," Elena finished the last of the pudding and put down her fork with a sigh of mingled satisfaction and regret. "I'm sure I will turn into a fat, ugly, horrible woman if I continue to eat like this."

"I'm glad you like it," I looked at Elena, who was sitting on the other side of the old oak table. She was dressed in an orange printed strapless dress. I caught my breath at how stunning she looked in this dress when she walked into the kitchen this evening. "Go to the living room. I will bring the wine out there."

With a smile, she got up from the table, walked to the living room and went to stand at the windows. Music stole softly into the dark shadows of the living room. I came to the living room with a bottle of wine and wine glasses in my hands. I set the wine glasses and wine bottle on the table. Then I straightened and walked toward her.

"Did I tell you how good you look in that dress?" I stopped directly behind her.

"Mmm."

I put my hands on her shoulders and turned her slowly around to face me. "You look stunning if it isn't obvious."

"Thank you," she smiled sheepishly as I took her into my arms and began to move, very slowly, to the very slow music.

She put her head on my shoulder. My arms tightened around her. My thumb touched the base of her spine.

"Would you mind if I ask you a question?"

I put my mouth against her temple. 'Sure. Any question, sweetheart."

"Have you thought about the future?" She swallowed. "Our future? Let's say five years from now, where are you?"

I said nothing for a moment, dancing in thoughtful silence. We danced for another moment or two. Then I brought her to a halt near the window.

"How about you?" I asked.

"Easy. With you." Elena answered without hesitation. She raised her head very swiftly from my shoulder "I should finish my surgical training by that time. And you will have your own café, I'm pretty sure of it."

I tipped her chin up. "Hmm...You got it all figured out, don't you?"

She smiled back at me. "Do you see a future with me? Because that's all I see."

I knew she wished I would say it back to her. She wanted to hear the words from me but I just couldn't get those words word from my mouth. I couldn't make any promises to Elena. Instead, I bent my head and touched her lips in a soft kiss. "Let's just dance, OK?"

"Damon…"

I covered her mouth with mine and scooped her into my arms as I carried her to the bedroom.

It was spring but I was sweating. Where was I? There was a woman lying on the floor moaning weakly and she seemed barely conscious. I took a step closer. It was Katherine. "No! No!" I rushed towards her and scooped her into my arms. "You can't be dead! You can't!" Tears flowed down my cheeks as I hugged her body close to mine.

"She's dead because of you."

"Who are you!?" I couldn't see anyone in the dark. "What do you want!?"

I heard heavy steps in front of me and a male figure appeared. It was Klaus. "No!" I couldn't believe my eyes. "You are dead!"

Klaus laughed and suddenly his face started to change. What was going on? I blinked. It wasn't Klaus. It was Stefan.

"Stefan?" My voice was shaky and my entire body was trembling.

"You don't deserve anything. You are a murderer. You are a liar. You only hurt the people around you." Stefan pointed his finger at me. His voice was harsh and maniacal. "You don't deserve Elena. You will destroy her."

"Elena?" I looked down at the woman in my arms. It wasn't Katherine. "Oh my God! No! No!" I screamed. It was Elena.

I woke gasping for air, sitting straight up in bed, my hand to my stomach to fight my nausea, my body moist and the sheets wet with my sweat. It was a nightmare. Just a horrible dream. Elena was sleeping peacefully next to me.

Still, I was panting as I slid my feet to the floor and stumbled to the bathroom, completely naked. I closed the door and flipped on the light, staring at the terrified face looking back at me in the mirror.

 _I don't deserve Elena. I will destroy her._

Shivering, I flipped on the shower, letting the water get hot before stepping inside, hoping the warmth would take away the cold chill running up my spine from the shock of the horrible dream.

 _I'm a murderer. I'm a liar. I will only hurt the people around me. I will hurt Elena._

I poured body wash into my hand, using it liberally, trying to scrub away the memories of my dream. Pain tore through my chest at the knowledge that I didn't deserve Elena. It was the truth.

"Hey," Elena was suddenly behind me, wrapping her arms around my waist. "Are you okay?"

"Bad dream. I was all sweaty," I murmured, hoping she wouldn't ask too many questions. Not now.

"Then you definitely should have woken me up. I love being all sweaty with you," she said in a husky voice. She turned me around and looked into my eyes. "Are you sure you are okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine now," I lied hastily as I pulled her close to me. I dipped my head and caught her mouth beneath my own. Oh God, I'd like to take Elena with me wherever I went, never having to be away from her ever. I pinned Elena to the tiled wall, pushing her arms above her head.

"I can't go easy, Elena," I said, my voice strained and edgy. "I want to be inside you more than I want to breathe right now. I have to have you. Now."

"I'm okay with that," she breathed out, her voice a husky whisper as she stared into my eyes.

I held her gaze as I thrust into her, burying myself in her with a groan. Elena let out a cry as I filled her, stretched her until she could feel nothing but me. Her body was quivering with need, as I thrust in and out of her body, while continuing to kiss her lips and neck. I wanted more, I needed more.

Moments later I rinsed us both gently and shut off the water. After drying both of us, I carried Elena back to bed and held her. We fell asleep entwined together, two pieces fit together perfectly. She was mine for now. But how long for before I had to let her go?


	17. Chapter 17

**Elena**

Damon had been impossible all week. Ever since we had gone to the lake house for the weekend, he'd been looking for excuses to pick an argument with me. Now he wouldn't even answer my calls or text messages. What was wrong with him? He scowled at me the other night when we went to a movie at Richmond because I was wearing a skirt that was too short. Too short according to Damon. After that he complained about the food in the restaurant and how ill-mannered the waiters were. He was annoyed when I smiled at the waiter who brought our salad. The whole argument was ridiculous.

There had been very little conversation on the way back to Mystic Falls. "Can you tell me what's going on?" I decided I had to break the silence. Damon had been in a strange mood the whole evening.

"Nothing." His answer was short.

I gritted my teeth. "Something is wrong."

"Nothing is wrong."

"Don't give me that, Damon. I'm not buying it."

"Do you have a problem with something?" he barked out.

Anger surged. Why, I wondered fiercely, did he have to be so damned unapproachable now?

"You are the problem!" I retorted.

"Oh, now I'm the problem." He gripped the wheel and braced himself. "Why are you going ballistic now?"

I crossed my arms beneath my breasts. "You are upset about something, aren't you?" My voice was tight and wired. "What the hell is going on here, anyway?"

"I said nothing!" he exploded. "And stop acting like a patient, saintly wife."

"That does it." I erupted and pushed open the passenger's door. "You can continue to be a jerk as long as it suits you." I got out of the car and slammed the car door.

"Yes, I'm a jerk!" he shouted through the open window and pulled out of my driveway before I could react.

I had a restless night. I had every right to be furious with Damon, I decided. Blinking away frustrated tears, I bit down on my lip and buried my face in the pillow.

x x x

Carrying a bowl of popcorn, I headed into the living room, where Caroline and Andie had been watching a movie. We had spent the whole Saturday afternoon in the shopping mall. It was a girls weekend where we would shop, eat and gossip. It was definitely a good idea to take my mind off Damon, at least for a while. I glanced at the television set's giant-sized screen as I placed the popcorn bowl on the table and heaved a silent sigh of relief that the climactic ending was nearly over. "Caroline, you have watched The Notebook for a million times. Don't you ever get sick of it?"

"The Notebook is epic," Caroline dabbed her eyes with a hankie. "Luckily Tyler and I have good ending."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Andie raised her eyebrows and I looked at Caroline suspiciously.

The beautiful blonde grinned. "We are engaged!"

"Oh my god!" Both Andie and I screamed. "We are so happy for you," we both said together, laughing as Caroline joined in the group hug.

"So when's the big day?" Andie asked.

"There will be an engagement party at Tyler's house and you girls have to turn up, okay?" Caroline sounded so thrilled and happy.

I wished Damon and I could work out our relationship. And suddenly I realised I wanted to marry Damon. I wanted to be his wife and the mother of his children.

"What's going on between Stefan and you?" Andie put her arm around my shoulder. "Any good news?"

"There is nothing going on between Stefan and me." I sat down on the sofa. "We are just friends."

"What about Damon?" Caroline sat across the other side of the sofa. Andie's eyes widened. "You left with Damon the other night."

Andie sputtered wildly over her tea, "You what!?"

"I was drunk! He sent me home," I protested.

"Oh, please." Caroline snorted disbelievingly. "I saw the way you wrapped yourself around him that night."

"That's explain why he has avoided me since that kiss," Andie took a sip of her tea. "Damon Salvatore has found another target."

"You sounded as if he is a man slut." I realized that my own temper was starting to fray.

"Well, he is, isn't it?" Caroline retorted. "He jumped onto Andie first and then you."

"He did not!" I yelled back. "Look, I know you two have issues with him, but I don't hate him." I stood up and grabbed the bowl of popcorn on the table. "Party's over. You guys need to leave."

"Come on, Elena," Andie stood up and walked towards me. "Caroline is just looking out for you."

"I have enough of this!" I erupted. "No more lies! No more hiding!" The muscles in my jaw tightened as I continued. "I slept with Damon. And I don't give a shit about what people think."

"You what!?" Both Andie and Caroline gasped.

"Damon and I are together. I'm in love with him."

"What about Stefan?" Caroline paced the floor as she continued. "This is not good. This is not good."

I rubbed my face with my hand. What was the matter with me? I shouldn't have told Andie and Caroline.

"Okay, you guys need to leave. Now." I turned on my heels and strode to the kitchen.

My hands were shaking so badly and I felt like I was suffocating. What the hell had I done? Damon would be so angry if he found out about this. And Stefan. How would he react to the news? God, I hated myself so much.

"Elena, are you okay?" Andie stood behind me and touched my shoulder gently.

"I'm so sorry," I turned around and wrapped my arms around her. "I'm sorry." I tried hard to blink my tears away.

"I'm sorry too," Caroline said as she walked into the kitchen. "I promise to never again judge ever."

"We are friends again?" Andie asked softly.

I pulled away and smiled at the girls. "Of course we are friends. Always."

Caroline stepped closer and rubbed my arm. "What are you going to do?"

"Just please don't tell Stefan about me and Damon," I held Caroline's hand. "I promise that I'll tell him. I just - I need to figure out some stuff first."

"Of course." Caroline answered. "You have my words."

"I won't say anything too," Andie added.

"Andie, look, I know you…"

"Elena, it's okay," Andie stopped me before I could finish. "I'm over it. It's only a kiss. No big deal," she shrugged and a sheepish smile appeared on her face. "Wes and I are together. Again."

"No, you must be joking," was all I could say and I could see Caroline was as stunned as I was.

"I thought things were over between us but we bumped into each other a few weeks ago. I had a flat tired and Wes helped me…" Andie broke off and blushed a little when she realised she was almost gushing. "Well, we had dinner and talked in the last few weeks. Things sort of just happen, you know."

"I'm so happy for you." I grabbed her hand. "I want you to be happy. I want you to be happy too Caroline," I glanced over to Caroline as I spoke.

"Do you want us to help with the dishes?" Caroline asked.

"No, why don't you girls go? It's late now." I walked them to the front door. "Drive safely."

"Good night," the girls waved at me before getting into the car.

I sighed as I closed the front door. What a night, I thought. How dramatic a girls' weekend could turn into?

The doorbell rang just as I started cleaning the dishes. Who would that be at this time of night? I wondered. Maybe Caroline or Andie had left something behind.

"Elena, we need to talk." Damon's voice. I froze. My hand was trembling as I reached the door knob. I took in a deep breath.

"Uh, hi," I said, throwing open my front door.

"Hey," Damon responded as he stepped inside.

"How are you?" I asked, in my best polite voice. Dumb question, I regretted immediately when the words came out.

"Okay," he said, wandering into the living room.

"Uh…would you like a drink?" I asked, feeling awkward as I followed him.

"Is Jenna away again?"

"Logan has a new job in Richmond and Jenna has decided to move in with him."

"I see."

We stood in silence for several moments before Damon finally spoke. "Uh…I'm sorry."

I realized my heart was beating much too quickly. Maybe I shouldn't have had that cup of strong coffee after dinner. "Why did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Being a jerk that night."

He didn't answer.

A long beat. "Are you trying to push me away again?"

He remained silence.

"I want an answer."

For a long moment – too long – Damon stared at me. "I'm sorry, Elena."

"I thought you want me. But why do you keep pushing me away? I don't understand." Tears spilled from my eyes.

Damon reached over and put his arms around me, cradling me against his chest, stroking my hair and kissing my forehead. "I'm so sorry," he said quietly. His voice was filled with guilt. "I don't want to hurt you. It hurts me more than anything to see you cry."

I looked up. Could I take a chance on him? Could I lay my heart on the line again? To find my answer, I looked deep into his eyes. There, I saw guilt, pain and vulnerability.

I touched his face. God, I loved this man. I could never walk away from him ever. "Stay with me tonight." It wasn't a question. I knew what I wanted. Continuing to hold his gaze, I slowly walked my fingers up his chest and moved my face closer to his. "Stay with me tonight," I murmured against his lips.

He took a deep breath and engulfed my mouth with his. The kiss was passionate but tender and so much more. His arms snaked around me, pulling me so hard against him that I could feel the fabric of his T-shirt branding my skin. I curled my arms around Damon's neck and moaned when I felt his tongue sweep the inside of my lower lip, then went on to taste more of me. Heat suffused my entire body. He scooped me into his arms and headed upstairs to my bedroom.

Damon laid me on my bed and came on top of me. Carefully, he traced my lips with the tip of his finger, then let it trail down my chin and over my collarbone. My eyes closed and I sighed deeply. "Don't leave me," I whispered softly.

"I will never leave you again," he said softly, then gently kissed me.

He removed my clothing with practised skill and maddening leisure, frequently stopping to nibble and caress. My head was thrown back against the pillow, my chin raised, allowing his seeking mouth access to my throat. His lips settled on my mouth, kissing it with infinite passion and tenderness. His lips were still resting on mine as he whispered, "I need you. I want you so much…" I sealed his words inside by capturing his lips with my own. I was willing to surrender myself to this man forever.

x x x

"Was something wrong that night?" I asked gently as we lay side by side holding each other close. "Were you upset about something?"

He sighed. "I have doubts about myself, about us."

"How can you have doubts about us?" I asked, propping myself up on one elbow and gazing down at him. "You should know how I feel about you, about us by now." I was a little annoyed with Damon's words.

"Being stupid, I guess," he chided himself with a short laugh. "You should know by now that Damon Salvatore can be so dump that he couldn't see things clearly. It's you who change my life. You make me a different man."

"Damon." The word was mumbled as I leaned over him and claimed his lips with my own. Breathless from the kiss, I snuggled over his chest and rested my head under his chin. He stroked my back leisurely.

"What would you say if we leave Mystic Falls together?" he surprised me by asking. I raised my head and looked at him. He went on. "I'm thinking about New York. You can finish your training there. I've spotted an advertisement about a shop on sale in one of the suburbs. I think it would make a nice café."

"Damon, that sounds wonderful," I said excitedly. "But what about your family here? Besides," I added, "buying a property in New York will cost a fortune."

"I may sound selfish here but I don't think Stefan will ever see me again if he knows about us," he paused. "I want a life with you, Elena. My mother had left some money for me in a trust fund when she died but I didn't want to use it, not especially after what…what happened. But I will now because I want to build a future with you."

"Damon," I breathed.

"I need you." He pulled me close to him. "I have never felt happier in my life until I met you. I want to lie with you in bed every night and wake up with you in my arms…"


	18. Chapter 18

**Damon**

"I will ring you as soon as I arrive, OK?" I said, clutching the phone with one hand and putting some clothes in the suitcase with the other. "Baby, I will text you the room number when I check-in," I glanced at my watch quickly before continuing, "I need to go now."

"Ring me as soon as you land," Elena said. "I wish I could come along. I miss you."

I smiled. "Hey, I am only away for two days. I will be back before Sunday evening. Why don't we have dinner on Sunday night? You can pick the place."

"I will pick you up at the airport on Sunday and we can decide about dinner later."

"Sounds great," I glanced at my watch again. "I really need to go, babe. I will ring you later."

"Have a safe trip. I miss you."

"I miss you too," I whispered.

Elena and I had talked about the plan of moving to New York for weeks now. Our relationship seemed to be stronger after I had told Elena that I wanted her to come to New York with me. I wanted to have a future with her. She was my life. I couldn't image the rest of my life without her in it.

Lying to Stefan was a mistake. Yes, I did feel guilty. But now I didn't give a damn. I wanted Elena. She was mine. If Stefan was going to throw a big fuss about this, let it be. All I cared about now was my life with Elena. Our life together in New York.

I heard banging on my door while I put my jacket on. Now, who would be pounding at my door at this hour where most people I knew would be at work?

"Damon, it's Stefan. Will you please open up?"

For a moment I froze, not sure what to do. Had Elena told him? Or had Caroline or Andie given him the bad news?

Elena was so upset when she confessed to me that she had told Caroline and Andie about our relationship. She was almost in tears and couldn't stop blaming herself for being so reckless and irresponsible.

"I didn't think. I was an idiot!" Her voice was shaky and tears spilling from her eyes in an endless stream. "I'm so sorry, Damon."

I hated to see her cry. "It's not your fault," I pulled her into my arms. "Shhh. Everything is going to be okay. I promise you," I wiped away her tears and gently brushed my lips over hers.

 _Okay, don't panic, you can handle this, Damon._

Taking a long, deep breath, I opened the door. Stefan marched inside.

"Dad told me you have taken your trust fund. What are you going to do with that amount of money?" Stefan narrowed his eyes. "You know that's a lot of money, don't you? Damon."

So he hadn't known about Elena and me, I thought.

"I, uh, I don't know what to say," I began, trying to search for the right words. "It wasn't planned. I thought I would let you know once I have sorted out…"

"You are leaving, aren't you?" he interrupted. His gaze fell onto my suitcase.

"Let me explain, Stefan," I shoved a hand through my hair. Damn, this was harder than I expected. "Yes, I'm thinking of moving…"

"And you don't bother to tell your family!" Stefan raised his voice. "What kind of son are you!? What kind of brother are you!? You are just going to run away like that?"

"I'm not running away, for god sake!" I snapped. "I'm moving to New York to start afresh. I want a new life, Stefan. I want to have my own café."

There was a short silence.

"You should have told me. I can help you."

"I need a different kind of help, OK? I need you to let me go. Let me succeed or let me fail, but let me do it by myself... I need you to believe in me," I said quietly.

Stefan shoved his hands into the pockets of his sweater jacket. "I do believe in you, Damon. You are my brother."

"Thanks," I tried to smile at him but the guilt was overwhelming. "Look Stefan…"

"I understand, Damon." He walked towards me and patted my shoulder. "I understand. So when are you leaving?"

"Dammit!" I glanced at my watch. "I have a plane to catch. I have to meet the agent in New York at two pm."

"Come on," Stefan walked to the door. "I will give you a lift. Trust me, you won't miss your flight."

x x x

I was very pleased with the shop. The shop was previously a Chinese takeaway shop which had been in business for the last fifteen years. The owner had decided to retire since his children were not interested in the business. It was in a good location and the interior was still quite new, meaning that I didn't have to spend huge amount of money on renovation. Everything seemed to be working according to plan.

It was almost seven by the time I checked in to the motel. The motel room had fringed orange lampshades with scorch marks. The faded yellow bedspread had seen better days. The blue rug was threadbare. But there was a television, and the manager's office had soft drink and snack machines.

It would cost too much to stay in a hotel in New York. I just needed a shower and a bed. I really didn't mind.

Somewhere in my sleep I heard banging on the door. I fell asleep on the bed while watching television after I had finished my burger. I sprang to my feet and strode to the door. Looking through the peephole, I saw Elena.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I flung open the door. "You are not supposed to be here."

She gave me a wicked smile before throwing herself into my arms. "Surprise," she breathed, close to my ear, her voice seductive and sultry.

I pulled back to look at her face. "Elena, you aren't supposed…"

She snaked her hands behind my neck and brought my mouth to hers. I returned her kiss with a fire that heated my blood. Her tongue entwined with mine and she moaned one of her sweet little noises into my mouth, a needy sound that nearly made me lose it.

Pulling my mouth away from hers I gasped, "You are driving me crazy, you know."

"Was it good?" she asked me quietly as her mouth nuzzled my neck.

I laughed, wheezing as I replied, "Sweetheart, if it was any better it would have killed me." God, this woman was special. So sweet, so sexy. So…mine.

Mine.

A hard wave of possessiveness swept over me and my arms tightened around her.

"I actually was here to deliver your dinner," she informed me in a matter-of-fact voice. "But seeing you looking so gorgeous took away my appetite for food. I wanted to take a bite out of you."

Her hands swept over my body. "How do you expect me to resist? You're a walking temptation," she sniffed, but there was humour in her voice.

I chuckled softly against her hair. I couldn't help it. Elena was a miracle. My miracle. "How about I take a bite out of you, now?" I murmured warmly, my body more than ready to start rising to the occasion.

She broke away from me and picked up her suitcase on the doorstep before closing the door. "Oh no, you don't, mister. I'm starving now." She put the suitcase inside the room and removed her white leather jacket. "I have ordered sushi and it is on the way."

"Come on, sweetheart. Just a tiny nibble," I growled as I stalked her.

"Nope. No way. I need food." She laughed out loud as I pulled her into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck, dropping a soft kiss on my lips as she caressed the nape of my neck. "I miss you."

"I miss you too," I buried my face in her neck with a guttural sound. "I don't want sushi. I want you."

"No," she giggled and pushed me away gently. "I'm hungry."

There was a knock on the door. Elena grinned and rushed to the door. "Here comes the sushi."

We sat crossed-leg on the bed eating sushi for the next hour. I was actually embarrassed because I stayed in a cheap motel. I would have chosen a nice hotel if I knew Elena would turn up. But she didn't seem to mind. "I haven't stayed in a place like this before," she said with a devil look on her face. "I've never done it in a motel before." She reached out to touch my jaw.

Capturing her hand, I drew it to my lips, dropping light, soft kisses to her palm. "You are the most incredible woman; do you know that?"

"I didn't know. Why don't you tell me?" she winked at me.

My hand moved to the back of her neck, guiding her mouth to mine. I flipped her in one smooth motion, my mouth never leaving hers. One moment she was sitting next to me, and the next, she was spread out on the bed beneath me. Legs parting to accept my body, she wrapped her arms around my back, and her hips shifted longingly against my groin, whimpering into my mouth when my hard erection pushed against her mound.

She bucked and slipped her hands between our bodies, unsnapping her jeans and ripping at the zipper to get them undone. She wriggled, making me lift up while she lowered her jeans and panties enough to kick them off her legs. "Damon, I need you. I want you. Please love me."

I groaned as I reared up and tore open my jeans, yanking them down. And then, miraculously, I entered her with one strong thrust. She hissed as I slammed into her, stretched her, and possessed her completely. Hands entwined, my fingers squeezed hers. My heart ached as my body joined again and again with Elena's, knowing that this moment was pivotal, extraordinary and special.

She arched her back and my mouth covered hers. I groaned into her mouth, entwining my marauding tongue with hers, as I buried myself one last time deep inside her, my body trembling above her as I came, flooding her womb with heat.

Dragging my mouth away from her lips, my face fell against her neck. "You are incredible," I chanted breathlessly against her skin. She freed herself and wrapped her arms around me, threading her hands through my sweat-soaked hair, cradling my head against her neck. I was completely lost in Elena. Completely. Utterly. Willingly.

After an unknown amount of time, I rolled off of her. "I'm heavy. I'm sorry."

Curling into my side, she whispered softly, "It was fine. I like being so close to you."

"Thank you, Elena," I said as I wrapped one arm around her protectively and stroked the hair from her face with another.

"For what?" she asked, puzzled.

"For what just happened. For trusting me. For accepting who I'm. For loving me. For everything."

I couldn't see her face, but I didn't need to. I could hear the grin in her voice. "You are welcome."

I tightened my arms around her. "Now, will you tell me why you are here?"

Elena looked up and grinned broadly at me. "I have an interview with Mount Sinai Hospital."

"That's great news," I grinned. "You will be a great surgeon. I know you will be. I'm so proud of you, baby."

She snuggled close to me. "I like our life like this. You have your own café and I work at one of America's best hospitals. This is perfect."

"Mmm."

"Have you thought about the name?"

"What name?"

"The name of your café," she growled playfully. "Your café needs a name."

"Just call it Damon's cafe."

"Be more creative, Damon" She swatted my shoulder with a smile.

"Alright, alright." I thought for a moment as I propped up on one elbow. "Delena."

"What?" Elena looked up.

"Delena – the combination of Damon and Elena," I answered. "It's not my café, Elena. It's our café."

"Oh, Damon." Her expression stunned, she looked up at me with tears on her face.

"Don't cry." I wiped the tears from her face gently. "It was supposed to make you smile."

"I'm happy." She rested her head on my shoulder, murmuring softly, "I'm very happy."


	19. Chapter 19

**Elena**

Tonight was Caroline and Tyler's engagement party. I stood in front of a full-length mirror in her room, contemplating my appearance.

I frowned at myself in the mirror as I turned one way and then the other, trying to decide if I was overdressed. Or underdressed. Caroline had decided to have a theme for her engagement party and the theme was 1920s because she felt it was classy. The white flapper dress and the short, curly bob wig were perfect reminiscent of the 1920s.

Staring back at myself in the mirror, my eyes looked enormous. I had added make-up, the result not something that I was sure I liked. Was the lipstick a little too much? Oh hell, I just didn't know. Caroline should be the attention tonight as it was her engagement party.

How I wished Damon could be around to give me some comments. He had to work at the Grill today as they were short of staff. Damon promised he would turn up to the party as soon as he finished work by seven. Caroline somehow surprised me by asking Damon to attend her engagement party. Damon wasn't that keen initially because of Stefan but I really wanted him to be there. In the end he gave in and agreed to be my date, although he wouldn't be able to pick me up, at least he could join in later. He promised me a dance and I was kind of looking forward to it.

My phone beeped.

 _Everything ok? Are you ready yet?_

I smiled down at the text message from Damon after taking one last look in the mirror.

I sent a return text. _Yes, all well. You promise me a dance and don't you forget it._

My phone beeped again.

 _Can't wait to see you in that dress and wig._

I laughed softly and cooped a small, black bag from the bed and headed for the living room. The sound of a heavy engine lumbering down the drive toward the house stopped me at the stairs. Who would that be? I wondered. By the time I got to the front door and opened the door, Stefan was already on the porch.

"Oh good. I'm on time. I thought we could go to Tyler's house together." Stefan gave me a warm smile.

Damn.

"I can actually drive, Stefan."

His smile stayed in place but I thought I saw it tighten a notch or two.

"Sorry, I don't mean to be rude." I turned my wrist slightly to check my watch. "Maybe we should get going if we don't want to be late."

The Lockwood family had a lavish mansion at Mystic Falls as for generations the Lockwood family owned majority of the lands at Mystic Falls and almost all mayors of Mystic Falls came from this family. Tyler's home was stunning, surprisingly decorated in white, light, airy décor that made the already-spacious mansion appear even more enormous and grand. Well-dressed guests chatted in groups, their wealth and status obvious by their dress and their ease with the sumptuous surroundings.

"This is spectacular, isn't it?" Stefan whispered to me as we walked into the mansion.

"Hey, Elena! You are here finally."

Caroline was dressed in a completely stunning red silk flapper dress with sparkling rhinestone embellishment and a scarf hem.

"You look stunning, Caroline." I gave her a hug. "I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks. Eat, get a drink, have a good time," she suggested jovially and winked at us.

"Yes, we will," Stefan smiled as he lead me to the lavish food and drink tables. Caroline smiled back before moving away and advancing toward a group of people who were motioning for her to come over.

Stefan filled our plates from a large buffet that was bursting with elegant-looking appetizers that were being continually replenished by silent employees and we found a quiet corner to eat. I didn't have any idea what I was eating as I was busy watching the main entrance. Where was Damon? He promised he would turn up. He wouldn't decide not to come at all, would he?

"You don't like the food?" Stefan raised his eyebrows. "You seem pretty quiet tonight."

"No, no. The food was delicious," I smiled. "I'm just looking at the women dripping with diamonds and gems."

"Stefan!"

The male tenor voice carried across the room and both of us turned to see Tyler raising his arm, trying to get Stefan's attention.

"You better go," I told him with a smile. "I'm going over to talk to Caroline and her mum."

Stefan didn't look happy as I moved away from him. I sighed. Damon and I had to talk to Stefan soon. Real soon.

I chatted for quite some time with Caroline and her, until they were pulled away by another acquaintance. I strolled to a set of ornate doors, fairly certain that they led outside, knowing the view would probably be spectacular. There were more people outside, seated at small, intimate tables. Not all of them were occupied. It was getting later and the air was brisk, but it felt good to me after being inside the crowded house for so long.

I took a deep breath as I stepped outside. Damon was not here yet.

I took out my phone from my bag. _Where are you?_

"Are you missing me?"

Damon's voice pierced the silence right next to my ear and I whipped around to face him with a smile on my face.

"You are late," I murmured.

His eyes turned dark, his gaze roaming my body. I wanted to squirm when his perusal continued, his jaw firming as his eyes lingered on my exposed lower limbs.

"You're stunning," he answered in a husky voice, his eyes finally landing on my face.

"I'm not sure that I want other men to see you this way." He prowled forward, stopping in front of me. One hand on my forearm, he slowly caressed the exposed skin, making me shudder from his light, sensual touch. "You're way too much of a temptation."

"You are the one who look good enough to eat," I told him lightly.

Stefan looked good in his dark blue suit but Damon was looking as handsome as sin in a black full dress tailcoat notch collar 6 buttons pleated pants and a matching white lapelled vest. Hair neatly groomed, his evening dark whiskers already showing, he definitely looked good enough to eat.

"You are terrible, Elena Gilbert," he admonished me in his best teacher-like voice.

"Oh, I can be bad. Very, very bad," I told him in a seductive, low whisper, my arms wrapping around his neck. "Kiss me and I might behave. For now."

"I can't believe luck is actually on my side." A male voice appeared from behind, startling us and I quickly released my arms from Damon.

We turned around and saw a very handsome young man with brown hair and dark brown eyes. I couldn't recognise the face. Who was he?

"I have been looking for you for a very long time." His eyes were cold and I shuddered. I glanced at Damon. To my surprise, his face was like stone, his expression grim.

'What do you want Kol?" Damon asked gruffly as he stepped forward, putting a distance between the man and me.

"You killed my brother. What do you expect me to do?"

My mouth fell open. Kol Mikaelson. He was Klaus's brother.

Damon's response was a frigid stare. "Get to the point. What do you want?"

"Damon don't…" I grabbed Damon's arm. My heart was racing. This would be out of control if I didn't do anything. "Let's go inside."

Kol stepped forward, blocking our escape. "Leave us alone." My tone was sharp and I put my hand up to stop him from coming any closer. "I will call the security if you don't leave now."

"I see you are nice and cozy with another fling, Damon. Finally have moved on from Katherine?" Kol turned his attention to me. "Whatever he is giving you, I'll give you more if you come to me when he's finished with you."

Damon grabbed Kol by his suit. "If you dare to go anywhere near Elena, I will make sure I will kill you with my bare hands," Damn growled. He looked like a feral animal. "Do you understand?"

A few men came rushing towards us. Gosh, we had caused a scene.

"Hey, Damon, let him go!" Tyler tried to separate Damon and Kol. Damon released his grip and stepped backwards.

"What the hell is going on?" Caroline appeared with her arms folded across her chest. She was fuming.

I looked from Damon to Kol and then back again. I was in shock and frightened, all at the same time.

"You killed my brother and you can't just walk away from it!" Kol yelled as he straightened himself.

Everyone gasped. Damon jaw tightened as he crammed his fist into Kol's face. Kol fell backwards and landed on the ground.

"Oh my God!" A woman screamed.

"Are you crazy!?" Stefan grabbed Damon's shoulders.

"You bastard!" Kol shouted as one of the guests hauled him up from the ground.

"You need to leave," Caroline shot a glance at Damon. "Now!"

"Caroline…" Oh, God. I was going to be sick. How did it end up like this?

Damon jerked his arms out of Stefan's hold and ran, deviating from the path to run across the well-manicured lawn to the front of the house.

"Damon wait…" I rushed towards Damon's direction but he was too fast. He was gone by the time I reached the driveway.

x x x

The drive back to my house was trying. Stefan and I were uptight and agitated about what had happened at Tyler's house. Damon hadn't answered my calls or text messages. I was very worried about him. He must be very upset now. I wanted to be with him now to hold him, to let him know I would always stand by his side no matter what happened.

Stefan walked me to the porch and stopped.

"What's going on between Damon and you?" he asked.

"Stefan, it's late. Can we talk later?" I tried to keep my voice flat. This wasn't the best time to tell Stefan about Damon and I.

He narrowed his eyes as he looked at me. "You care about him, Elena. Is that the reason why?"

"What?"

Stefan released a ragged sigh. "I told you how I feel about you but you have never given me an answer." His voice was filled with an aching sadness and remorse. "You are in love with him. You love Damon. Am I right?"

For an instant I didn't move. I couldn't lie to Stefan any longer. He deserved to know the truth. "Yes, I love Damon. I'm in love with him."

"How long have you two been together for?"

"Stefan…"

"Tell me! How long!?" His eyes grew stormy and he grasped my wrist. "Don't lie to me."

"Stefan you are hurting me," I tried to push Stefan away but he tightened his grip on my wrist.

"Let her go!" Another male voice sounded, one that I recognized. It was Damon.

Damon grabbed my shoulder and yanked me away from Stefan. I was quickly jerked back against a hard chest. Looking up, I could make out Damon's furious face as he wrapped his arm around me. "Are you okay?"

I nodded. "I'm fine."

"Why? Why did you lie to me? You are my brother!" Stefan yelled out. "I trusted you!"

Damon said nothing.

"Stefan please listen…" I took a step towards Stefan. "I care about you. You will always be my good friend."

Stefan shook his head. "I can't believe this!" He stared at us as he said gruffly. "You two are liars, and I'm a real idiot who believe you two."

There was a short silence. Stefan was right. We were liars.

He shot us a glare before getting back to his car and drove away. We watched the taillights until they disappeared into the darkness.

"He was right, Elena. I'm a liar," Damon choked out, tears clogging his throat and making his voice raspy. "I'm a terrible brother."

"Damon, it's not your fault." My hand clasped his, my thumb running loosely up and down his palm. "Please don't blame yourself."

Damon gave me a sad smile before pulling me into his arms. "Can I stay with you tonight? I don't want to be alone."

I wrapped my arms around his waist and buried my face in his chest. "Of course."

We fell asleep sometime after midnight so when I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing the first thing I did was look on the other side of the bed. Damon did not stir. I sighed and threw an arm over my eyes while answering the call.

"Who's this?"

"Elena, is Damon with you?" It was Caroline and she sounded hysteria.

"What's wrong?" I sat up. I could feel a chill running down my spine.

Damon groaned and opened his eyes. "Who's calling?"

"It's Stefan," Caroline said. "He's been in an accident."


	20. Chapter 20

**Damon**

It was my fault. It was all my fault.

Stefan was a careful driver. How had he gotten into an accident? Having ridden with him a few times in the past, I knew he obeyed the rules of the road. He wasn't a candidate for road rage and tolerated the occasional stupidity of other drivers with amazing calm. Definitely not like me who was reckless and impulsive. But just because he drove within the law didn't mean everyone else on the road did. Maye he'd been rushing to get home and someone ran a stop sign or a red light. Maybe someone cut him off. Maybe…

Maybe he was so angry with me that he wasn't paying attention while driving. Stefan was angry with me. He was upset because I lied to him. He was mad because I had been a terrible brother. I hurt him because I fell in love with Elena.

How bad had the accident been? Suddenly, dread closed its icy hand around my heart. Images of Stefan's maimed body trapped in his car accosted me. If I hadn't turn up to Caroline's engagement party, he wouldn't know the truth. If I hadn't appeared at Elena's house, he wouldn't have gotten into this accident.

It was all my fault. I hated myself. I hated myself so much.

My father's face was deeply lined with concern. I couldn't remember ever seeing him look so old or so worn. My heart ached so much. It was me who caused all these. I wanted to cry.

"You okay?" Elena asked as her fingertips caught my hand and my thumb came down to hold on to her fingers.

Unable to speak, I nodded.

"How's Stefan?" Caroline asked as she and Tyler made their way through the ER toward us.

"The doctor is still with him. His car skidded near the Wickery Bridge," Elena explained.

"Oh no!" Caroline exclaimed as blood drained her face.

"Stefan is always a careful driver. How did it happen?" Tyler asked. "Did he have a lot to drink last night? I didn't remember seeing him drinking a lot."

"It was my fault. It was my fault Stefan had an accident," I muttered. Elena stiffened beside me. I briefly bow my head before lifting it again to look at everyone. "It was my fault. Stefan had an accident because of me. I lied to my brother. I'm selfish. I fall in love with his girl. I'm nothing but a terrible brother," I caught back a little sob as I continued. "I'm a terrible brother."

"No, it isn't your fault," Elena protested. "It's not your fault. Don't blame yourself."

Caroline and Tyler glanced nervously at Elena but said nothing.

A doctor walked toward us. I held my breath. My father jumped to his feet. "How's Stefan? How's my son?" He asked before the doctor could say anything.

"He's lucky. His car is wrecked and the police still can't figure out how he got out without major injuries, but he did and he's okay. Just some minor flesh wound here and there. He is waiting for a CT head at the moment to make sure he didn't suffer any major head injury. I want him to stay for a day for observation just in case. He should be able to go home tomorrow."

"Thank God," Elena whispered and clutched my hand tighter. Everyone was relieved to hear the news.

Moment later, Stefan appeared on a wheelchair. I noticed his right arm was in a sling. His face was expressionless. The pain inside my chest was so intense.

"Are you okay, son?" Giuseppe asked as he took Stefan's hand, patting it.

"I'm fine," Stefan answered. His tone was flat. He didn't bother to look at me. "I just want to go home."

"You are going for CT now and then you will be transferred to the ward," the nurse who accompanied Stefan explained. She glanced at her wristwatch. "I'm sorry, the patient has to go now."

As I watched Stefan disappeared into the corridor, my father came to my side. "I think you should go, Damon. Stefan…he will be fine. He just need some time."

I nodded.

Retaining her grip on my cold hand, Elena led me to her SUV at the carpark. "I think you should take a nice hot shower and get some sleep. I'll buy some coffee and breakfast on the way back."

I looked into Elena's starling brown eyes. Guilt ate away at my insides. I should have never started a relationship with her. Truthfully, it was my fault. Stefan nearly died because of me. Elena deserved better. Now all her friends knew about my past. I was an ex-convict. Elena, on the other hand, would be a great surgeon in the future. I couldn't destroy her life.

I pulled my hand away from her and moved away. She stared at me, unable to comprehend what had happened. "Damon? What's wrong?"

She stepped toward me, her hands outstretched, but I backed away. "Damon, what is it?" Her voice sounding concern.

I took another step away from her. "No, Elena. I can't do this. I can't do this anymore."

"Do what?"

"You and I. This. We have to end this." I shoved my hand through my hair.

"Damon, it's not your fault, stop blaming yourself, okay?" she cried in anguish. "It's not your fault."

"It's my fault. It's always my fault," I retorted. "Stefan won't be in the hospital if I haven't lied to him." I struggled to lower my voice and to hold on to my temper. "I shouldn't have come back. I should have run away from you as far as possible. Then none of these would have happen."

Elena took a deep, shaky breath. "Damon please listen…"

I held out my hand to stop her. "This has to end. We are over." Abruptly I turned away. I had to get out of here fast before I changed my mind. I had to get away from Elena fast.

"No! Damon…" Suddenly she was running after me. "You can't just walk away like this."

I stopped but did not turn back to look at her. "You deserve better Elena. Just let me go." There was too much pain. I closed my eyes, a tightness gripping my throat. "Just let me go."

"You can't walk away when it's real," Elena called after me as I continued to walk.

x x x

I felt lifeless for the next few days. Stefan had gone home after his CT which turned out to be normal. But he hadn't talked to me since then. I hadn't talked to Elena either. She had called and texted multiple times. I left Mystic Falls and drove back to Trevor's place. I wanted to be alone. I deserved to be alone. I had been alone since Katherine died. How stupid was I thinking I could start a new life? My life had ended the moment Katherine and Klaus died. I drowned myself in bourbon until Rose came to drag me out of the bar.

"For God sake, Damon!" she yelled at me the next day when I woke up. "I'm not sure what's your problem. Stop running away. Be a man and deal with it."

She was right. I was running away. I had to. My father, Stefan, and most important of all, Elena would have a better life without me in it.

I turned up at Elena's house later that evening. I had to see her, for the one last time. I knew I was selfish but I couldn't leave without seeing her again.

When I saw Elena standing at the door, her eyes looking tired, I felt like killing myself. She definitely deserved someone better. When tears gathered her eyes, I pulled her trembling body in my arms. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," I whispered against her hair.

We sat in the living room, holding each other without saying anything. I wrapped my arms around her tightly as if she wasn't real.

"Promise me you will never leave me again," she said softly against my chest.

I tightened my grip on her because it forcibly reminded me that after tonight there'd be no more gestures of any kind. I would leave Mystic Falls in the morning and never come back. I would leave Elena forever. She would hate me forever. That's what I wanted. She had to forget about me and start a new life.

Trying to banish the bleak mood settling over me, I said, 'Dance with me."

Elena looked up.

"I want to dance with you tonight." It took every ounce of acting ability I possessed to keep the smile on my face so she wouldn't realize I was leaving her in the morning.

She nodded her head and gave me her beautiful smile.

I stood up and walked toward the stereo. Ross Copperman's voice lifted effortlessly into the first bars of an intensely romantic song, and I opened my arms to her. "Will you dance with me, Miss Gilbert?"

Elena nodded, smiling with pleasure. "Of course."

I slid my arm around her waist, moving her closer to me while listening to the poignant words of the song.

"Beautiful lyrics," I murmured, trying to steady myself, to tell myself that what I was feeling would soon fade when I was away from her. I gazed at her face, and the words of Copperman's song seem to pierce my heart:

 _When you're not next to me_

 _I'm incomplete_

 _'Cause I'm on fire like a thousand suns_

 _I couldn't put it out even if I wanted to_

 _There's flames tonight_

 _Look into my eyes and say you want me, too_

 _Like I want you_

Elena lifted her cheek from my chest and looked up at me, and as I looked into her eyes and heard the lyrics of the song, I felt my chest tighten.

 _Oh, love, let me see inside your heart_

 _All the cracks and broken parts_

 _The shadows in the light_

 _There's no need to hide_

"I love you Damon."

I tipped her chin up. "I know," I said in an aching, husky voice I scarcely recognized as my own, "I know." I bent my head and touched her lips in a soft kiss. And in that moment, I realized that sending her out of my life tomorrow was going to be harder than it had been to hear the prison gates clanging shut behind me thirteen years ago. Without realizing what I was doing, I tightened my arms around her, buried my face in her hair, and squeezed my eyes closed.

As we climbed into bed, I rolled on to my side and reached out to snare her and draw her firmly to my side. My face was inches from her. I wanted to memorise her beautiful face, her brown-doe eyes which sparkled when she laughed, and her sexy smile when I teased her. She whispered, "I love you. I love—"

My fingertips covered her lips, silencing the words when she tried to say them again. "Elena." That was all I said before my mouth opened on her lips taking them whole ad devouring them with a bold sensuality that she easily matched. That intense hunger was something she understood too well, and she returned it with equal aggression.

This time, we made love slowly, gently, without the fierce urgency of before. But the same torrent of emotions poured through me as I held her and moved inside her body. It was still just as overpowering, as devastating.


	21. Chapter 21

**Elena**

Damon was gone.

I felt as if a cold hand squeezed my heart. When I found out he had quitted his job and ended his tenancy, waves of intense and varied emotions battered me. First came pain so excruciating it felt as if someone had carved a hole in my heart with a dull, serrated knife.

Damon had left, and he hadn't even told her. Instead he had allowed me to think we had a future. The sound of my heart breaking and my world crumbling around me drowned out the noise of the people and the traffic on the street.

Next came anger. White-hot, soul-searing anger. Now I understood why he had come to my house the other night, why he had never told me he loved me, no matter how many times I had said those words, Damon had never completely trusted me with his heart. My stomach clenched.

The pain was so intense. Why didn't he trust me? Why didn't he believe that I cared about him? Why didn't he believe that I want a future with him?

He had left me.

No explanation.

No goodbye.

Just…gone.

Tears blurred my vision. "You lied to me," I whispered hoarsely. 'You have promised you would never leave me."

I hunched over as I felt a sudden ripping sensation through my abdomen. Warmth flowed between my legs. I wove unsteadily on the street. My world began tilting, and more fluid flowed down my legs. I wove on rubbery legs, my hands stretched outward to keep myself upright. Gasps and sobs exploded out my mouth as the pain made me hunch over again.

I bent over, my hands cupping my belly. Suddenly, I heard different people talking. Looking up, I noticed a few people were standing around me. I didn't know who were there, but I sank to my knees. I was too weak to stand, too weak to see if they were friends or foe. Then, as if someone had lowered a black curtain across my vision.

I knew nothing more.

x x x

White.

Nothing but white. It surrounded me, then ripped apart, cut through by flaming scissors of pain that slashed ruthlessly into my consciousness.

I desperately attempted to rouse myself, to pull free. To pull free of the pain that oppressively weighed me down.

A multi-coloured mosaic of incidents, feelings, sounds swirled through my brain and I tried to make sense of the shards. There was no whole, no picture, only fragments. Damon, his sensuous mouth smiling at me, fading farther and farther away as I tried to reach out and touch him. Lost, I was lost, running, searching to find my way.

"Damon where are you?" I tried to utter the words, but no sounds came out.

Was I dead?

No, I hurt too much to be dead. Being dead wasn't supposed to hurt. Was it?

Was I just dreaming?

I struggled against overwhelming weight to open my eyes. I felt as if there was something incredibly heavy pressing down on my lids, drugging my senses. If I just gave in, it would be all right. I wouldn't have to struggle, to flight.

But I wanted to open my eyes.

 _It's you who change my life. You make me a different man_. Damon's voice whispered in my ear.

 _Damon, please don't leave me._

His voice filled my head again. _I need you. I have never felt happier in my life until I met you. I want to lie with you in bed every night and wake up with you in my arms._

"Damon?" I whispered hoarsely. Dry, my lips felt dry, cracked, as if someone had taken a knife and cut little notches along them.

Something, no someone moved just next to me. I could sense it. A voice drifted to me from very far away, growing louder with each word.

"No, it's Jenna, Elena. Can you hear me?"

This time my eyelids did lift when I tried to move them. The stark whiteness I had sensed started to take shape. It was the curtain near my bed. There was someone there with me. I laboured hard to focus.

A lady in a grey blouse and dark jeans. Almond-coloured hair spilling down on the collar.

Jenna. My aunt.

"Can you hear me, Elena?" Jenna repeated, squeezing my hand.

"I can hear you, Jenna." I attempted to sit up but couldn't. "Where am I?"

"Mystic Falls Hospital. I came immediately as soon as the hospital called me."

"Damon…where's Damon?" I pushed myself up but almost fell of the bed.

"Elena, be careful." Jenna cried as she rushed to my side to hold me.

"I need to see Damon," I cried out. "Damon, where are you? Don't do this to me. Please. I need you." Tears slid down my cheek.

Jenna said nothing but just sat beside me, drawing my trembling body to hers.

I wasn't sure how long I had cried for. Maybe until Dr Meredith Fell walked in.

Meredith Fell was a gynaecologist/obstetrician at Mystic Falls Hospital. Why was I in the gynaecology ward? Another fear ripped through me as I gripped Jenna's hand more firmly.

"I'm sorry, Elena. We have tried our best. It is not uncommon for miscarriage to happen, especially when you were only six weeks pregnant."

My jaw dropped. "What!?" I choked out. "Miscarriage? I was pregnant?" I couldn't believe my ears. I must be hallucinating.

"Yes, you were six weeks pregnant," she answered. "Miscarriage which happens in early pregnancy usually indicates either there is malformation of the foetus which is incompatible with life or there is genetic abnormality…."

I didn't hear what she said next. I felt numb. I was pregnant. Pregnant with Damon's baby. Our baby. But I lost the baby.

Tears slid down my cheek again when I thought they were completely drained. I was too weak to hold them back any longer.

"Are you in pain? Can you give her something for it?" Jenna asked, concerned.

"Yes, of course we can to give her some pain killers," Dr Fell explained.

I shook my head. "They haven't got anything for this kind of pain, Jenna."

x x x

I slept intermittently for the next thirty-six hours. Apparently I had lost quite some blood and Dr Fell ordered a series of test performed on me to ascertain there were no complications from the miscarriage. Every now and then, unconsciously my hand would splay over my stomach, thinking about the baby I had lost. Was it a boy? Damon would love to have a boy, I thought. They could play soccer together and Damon could teach him how to drive when he grew up. Maybe it was a girl. I would love to have a girl. I could tie her a ponytail every day and teach her how to make up when she grew up. Damon would freak out when our daughter started dating. I could imagine how uptight he would be.

"Hi, how do you feel?"

I turned around to find Stefan standing in the doorway. He held a bunch of roses in his hand. His smile was warm.

I smiled back. "Still surviving."

"The flowers are for you," he placed the roses on the table next to my bed. "Caroline told me you like pink roses."

"Thank you," I said as I gestured him to take the seat beside my bed. "How are you, Stefan?"

I hadn't spoken to him since he had the accident. It was too awkward, and most important of all, I felt guilty because I lied to Stefan.

"Still surviving," Stefan replied, throwing the same words back at me. We looked at each other for a moment before grinning like silly children. Although there was no chemistry between Stefan and I, I had always felt comfortable with him. Like he was family. Like a brother.

"Have you heard from Damon?" he asked after a brief silence.

The agony filled my heart and soul immediately. I shook my head as I tried to hold back a sob.

"He's scared, Elena. That's why he is running away."

"But why?" I asked, trying to control my emotions. "I will be there for him no matter what happens."

"Damon has gone through a lot. He has lost our mum and Katherine. He thought he doesn't deserve to be loved. Until you came along." He took my hand in his. "Trust me, he cares about you. He loves you more than anything."

I wanted to believe Stefan, almost as much as I wanted to believe that Damon would eventually come back to me. But would he?


	22. Chapter 22

_Five years later…_

 **Damon**

I watched Bonnie and Enzo finished the last of the key lime pie and put down their forks with a sigh of mingled satisfaction. The slice had been arranged with artistic precision on the plate and trimmed with a paper-thin almond wafer and a slice of lime.

"The pie was incredible," Bonnie exclaimed. "You have nailed it again, Damon."

"You don't think I went a little overboard with the lime zest?" I asked.

"You can never have too much zest, I always say."

I nodded. "It's sort of like sparkle, I guess."

"You know, when it comes to cooking, you've got a real talent." She smiled at me. "This dessert definitely deserves a place on the new menu."

I met Enzo five years ago when I came to Chicago. He owned a café in one of the busiest streets in Chicago. I desperately needed some money at that time and there was a part-time job at his kitchen which I took it without hesitation. And soon we became friends. Bonnie was his fiancé, who was a food critic. They met three years ago when Bonnie decided to write a critic on Enzo's café, and not long later they fell in love. Enzo appreciated my cooking skills and asked me to become a partner when he decided to open a restaurant a year ago. I had always wanted to have my own café and I enjoyed working together with Enzo. It was a great package I couldn't decline.

Denzo was opened a year ago and our business was getting better every day. Bonnie wrote a critic on our restaurant a few months ago and since then our bookings had gone mad. It was nearly impossible to reserve a table at Denzo with less than two weeks' notice at the moment.

I was very pleased with the progress we had made. Enzo dealt with the management as I would always get a headache when I saw the paperwork. "I would just hide inside the kitchen," I told Enzo when we first started. Things worked out pretty well in the end. I loved every single minute being in the kitchen.

I kept myself busy all the time in these five years. I read different cook books, watched documentaries on food from various countries and researched online about different cuisines. I had to constantly keep myself busy because if I didn't, I couldn't seem to go five minutes without Elena filling my thoughts. I had just about made a fool of myself earlier in the week when I had spied a brunette with long dark brown hair having a meal at Denzo, but it had turned out to be somebody else.

The nights were the worst, when I would lie there on my bed and replay in vivid detail the time I had spent with her at the Lake House. The memories would leave me aching and restless and feeling more alone than I ever had in my life.

I pushed the thought away. I was doing okay. Better than okay. Wasn't I? Finally I had my own restaurant and I was able to enjoy my work. But who was I kidding? I wasn't okay. I was lonely and miserable and missed Elena like crazy. I did the right thing. Elena deserved better. She would be a surgeon by now. A great surgeon. Maybe she had married and had children by now. It broke my heart into jagged little pieces when I imagined Elena walking down the aisle in a beautiful white gown and I wasn't the groom.

x x x

"Hey Damon, I want you to meet a special guest tonight," Enzo said as he walked into the kitchen. "Professor Whitmore is one of the best surgeons at Chicago and he saved my dad's life a few years ago. He has brought some colleagues here tonight. They are impressed with the food. I told them our chef will drop by to say hello."

I sighed. I didn't like meeting customers but Enzo believed it was a way to promote our business. "Okay, just five minutes," I blew out a breath and dropped my knife on the kitchen counter. "I have to get back to deserts ASAP."

"Sure," he winked at me. "By the way, the female doctor with Professor Whitmore is definitely a beauty."

I rolled my eyes. "She is our customer. Behave yourself, Enzo."

Bonnie and Enzo hadn't let a day go by in the last few years without reminding me that I needed to find a woman. They had been trying to hook me up with various women in the last few years. There would be no other woman on God's green earth who might interest me anymore besides Elena Gilbert. Somehow I needed to make them understand that I wasn't interested in a female companion. I'd had the love of my life…and had managed to mess things up completely. There wasn't anyone else for me, except Elena. She was my one and only. I couldn't be with anyone else. Not now. Not ever.

"Good evening, Professor Whitmore, I hope you all have enjoyed your meal," Enzo smiled politely as we arrived to a table seated with two men and a woman. "Damon Salvatore, our chef is the one who creates the lovely dishes tonight."

I nodded my head slightly and smiled. Then my smile froze when my eyes met hers. Elena.

There was no mistaking this one. My heartbeat suddenly sounded unnaturally loud in my ears. She looked surprised to see me as well. Her jaw dropped.

"Damon," she whispered softly.

Enzo and the other two men glanced at me as if they could get an answer from me. Before I could response, Elena jumped up from her chair, clattering the dishes as she bumped into the table. "I think I will get some fresh air."

"Elena, what's wrong? Are you okay?" One of the men beside her stood up and touched her arm gently. Jealousy surged through my body. Was he Elena's boyfriend?

"I'm fine, Aaron," she tried to force a smile. "I will be right back."

Ignoring Enzo, I followed Elena out of the restaurant.

"Elena, wait," I grabbed her wrist and turned her around. Wearing a sophisticated sleeveless knee-length black dress, she looked both elegant and glamorous. She still looked so beautiful, I thought. I wanted to reach out to touch her face so I could assure myself she was really here and not some delusional fantasy.

"I thought…What are you doing in Chicago?" I asked.

She took a quick breath. "I…I got a job here a few months ago." She sounded nervous.

"Are you okay?" I asked, concerned. Elena's body was trembling. "You don't look well."

She tore herself from my grip and stepped back, staring at me through wide, confuse-filled eyes. "Yes, I'm okay." She drew a deep, steadying breath. "No. No. Not okay." She rubbed her brow. "I don't know."

There was a short, stark silence.

"Why did you come after me?"

"To see you," I said and moved a step closer to her but she backed away.

"Okay. You have seen me. I'm just fine."

She lied. I knew she lied.

"Well, I'm not."

She stared at me, stunned. "I don't understand."

I sighed and shoved my fingers through my hair. "Neither do I, Elena. Neither do I. See, I had everything worked out when I left you back there in Mystic Falls. I figured it would be best for you if we went our separate ways."

She looked at me for a long time, eyes widening. I took a deep breath. "I also knew that when I left," I continued in a strangled voice, "that I couldn't be the kind of man you needed. I probably could never be the kind of man you deserve."

She flinched. "You walked out of my life because you made the decision – the completely unilateral decision – that you weren't the kind of man I needed or deserved?"

"Something like that."

She raised her hand and slapped me hard on my face. "How dare you!? How could you do that!?" Her voice was trembling and tear slid down her cheek. "You left me! No goodbye, no explanation, just…"

I grabbed her in my arms and kissed her with all the pent up desire I had been holding in the past five years. She punched me in the chest for about two seconds and then her body went limp in surrender. My hands ran down her back, to grip her luscious behind and pull her up tight against my body. She gasped in my mouth, as her body connected with mine. She threw her arms around my neck and held on tightly, as I devoured her mouth with mine.

"Elena, are you okay?"

At the sound of Aaron's voice, Elena released her arms and pushed me away. Her face was flushed and her chest heaving in an effort to fill oxygen-starved lungs.

"Elena?" Aaron asked cautiously as he approached us. "What's going on?"

"Let's go back inside." She took his arm, avoiding eye contact with me. "The night air doesn't seem to be agreeing with me." Without another word she turned and walked back into the restaurant together with Aaron, leaving me to follow behind them.


	23. Chapter 23

**Elena**

It took less than a minute for me to realise that there was no going back to normal. Twenty-four hours had passed since 'the kiss' and I still felt the searing heat of Damon's lips on mine. My body was too aware of him. I could hardly think straight. I wouldn't be fine. Not now. Not tomorrow. Probably not for a very long time.

Five years.

Damon had left without a word for five years.

And all of a sudden he was right in front of me.

He was the chef of Denzo.

I had heard from a few colleagues at Chicago Hospital commenting the great food served at Denzo. Apparently Denzo was one of the most exquisite places to eat and as well as one of the finest restaurants in town. When I stepped into Denzo last night, I couldn't say I wasn't impressed. The uniquely textured walls produced a smooth yet flowing look. The viny plants that clasped to the walls ever so freely give it a natural appearance. The marble tiled floor gave the restaurant a clean yet warm appearance.

How long had Damon been working there? According to Aaron, Denzo had only been in business for over a year. So where had he been in the last few years? I flew to New York to look for him after I had recovered from the miscarriage. To my disappointment, Damon couldn't be found. He had forfeited the deposit for the shop in New York. He probably didn't want me to track him down. He had just disappeared as if he had never really existed beyond my imagination.

Living without Damon in the last five years wasn't easy. I had never gotten over him. I probably never would. He had haunted me for the last five years. He got under my skin like a sliver of wood that's always a little bit raw and irritated, never working its way out again.

Jenna, Caroline, Andie and Stefan had been very supportive. They tried to keep me occupied when I wasn't working. Jenna and Logan got married a year later after Damon had left. Andie and Dr Maxfield moved to Seattle last year after Dr Maxfield was appointed as the vice dean of University of Washington. Stefan was now a surgeon at Mystic Falls Hospital. He was dating Valerie, one of a new theatre nurses who joined the hospital a year ago. They were a very happy and loving couple. Caroline and Tyler were planning to get married by end of the year.

All of them had found their mates, the person who made them feel whole, and the happiness that surrounded those couples was almost painful for a woman like me who felt so alone, so solitary. I was damned happy for all of them—every one of them deserved to be happy. But it wasn't easy not to feel lost, not to mention a little odd, when I was around them.

In the last two years, I had changed the subject every time Jenna mentioned that maybe I should find some male company. "I feel the same way about Damon as you feel about Logan. I loved him. I still do. Nothing will ever change that. There isn't anyone else for me, Jenna."

"You feel that way now, Elena, but someday—"

"I'll feel exactly the same way next year, ten years from now, and every day after that." I wasn't going to bullshit her. No one could replace Damon.

 _I figured it would be best for you if we went our separate ways. I also knew that when I left, that I couldn't be the kind of man you needed. I probably could never be the kind of man you deserve._

My insides went up in flames when I recalled Damon's words. Why couldn't he trust me with his heart? I didn't care about his past. Why did he always run away whenever there was a bump on the road? Why couldn't he stop running and deal with the problem?

"Hello, Elena."

I looked up at the sound of a husky male voice as it drifted in from the doorway of my office. I recognised the voice. It was Damon. My heart raced and my palms grew moist.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"You didn't," I answered as I stood up. "What are you doing here?"

Damon shrugged and stepped into the room. Dressed casually in a pair of jeans and a dark blue T-shirt, Damon still looked so sexy and handsome. "I…I'm here to see you."

"Are….are you sick?"

"Yes, I'm sick."

My face fell. "What? You are sick?" Quickly, I rushed toward him and grabbed his wrist to feel his pulse. "Did you see a doctor? Are you in pain? How long…"

I never got a chance to finish. Damon's hot, hard mouth smothered my words, never asking, simply demanding my response. His large, agile hands moved down my back and lifted me to a sitting position on the desk, making it easier for him to devour my mouth. I moaned into his mouth as his tongue thrust and retreated, thrust and retreated, until I was breathless. Surrendering, my arms wound around his neck, my hands fisting his silken wavy locks of hair, savouring the fall of softness over my fingertips.

Wrapping my legs around his hips, needing to somehow find an anchor to keep me from drifting away in a tidal wave of lust, I allowed my tongue to duel with his, feeling his arousal against my heated core. My hips surged against his erection with every hard thrust of his tongue.

When he finally lifted his head, I was too dazed to speak. He pulled my head forward to rest against his heaving chest.

"Elena. Elena, do you know how much I miss you?" he choked out, one hand spearing into my waves, stroking my hair reverently.

Oh, God. No. I couldn't be sucked in by Damon again. Not in any way. I shoved hard against his chest, twisting away and lowering my legs until my feet hit the floor. "Get off me."

Fury built to a raging inferno inside me. "How dare you!? You left without any words for five years. Five years! And out of a sudden you appear from nowhere and kiss me like that. You expect me to be okay with that!?"

"You hate me," he said sadly.

"Yes! I hate you!" I cried out and turned my head aside, brushing at the tears of futility starting to spill from my eyes. "I hate you because you lied to me. I hate you because you left me. I hate you because you run away whenever there is a bump on the road. I hate you for being a coward…" The dam of tears broke loose, flooding my eyes and shattering my voice as I wept. "I thought you loved me! I thought you cared about me! I waited for you to come back to me. I waited and waited," I cried, "but you never did."

"It's my fault," he groaned, and he yanked me into his arms. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

I clung to him, my wet cheek pressed against his shirt. "Damon," I whispered achingly, "I – I was pregnant but…but I had a miscarriage."

"Oh, my God!" Damon clasped me tighter to him, rubbing his jaw against my hair. 'Oh God!"

"I lost the baby," I whispered hoarsely, "I couldn't keep the baby. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault," he whispered brokenly, holding me tighter, running his hands over my back and shoulders. "I should be there for you. I shouldn't have left!"

Through the haze of my own sorrow and relief, I heard the anguish clogging his voice, saw the ravaged sorrow on his face, and tenderness poured through me, its sweetness filling my heart until I ached with it. "Don't cry," I whispered, my own tears falling unchecked as I reached up and laid my fingers on his hard cheek. "Damon, I forgive you. I will never hate you."

He looked down at my face. "But I hate myself."

My heart lurched at the naked remorse in his eyes. "It's over. Don't think about it," I said softly, leaning my face against the hard wall of his chest. "You are here now."

"I promise you," he said tightly, "I will try my very best to make it up to you in the future. I will never let you shed a single tear. I will make you smile every day. I will hold you in my arms every day and night," he said, and cradling my face, he bent his head and brushed his lips over mine. The exquisite tenderness of his kiss, the caressing way his fingers slid over my face made me smile against his lips. "And I will kiss you every day and night until you are so sick of it." His mouth slid to the corners of my eyes, and I felt the touch of his tongue on my tears. "And when you wanted me to, I'd have given you another baby-" he promised achingly, drawing me against his full length, his breath against my ear sending shivers down my spine.

"Damon…"

"I love you!" he whispered fiercely as he turned my face up to his. "I love you so much, Elena."

Tears of joy sprang to my eyes as I watched Damon slowly lowered his head and captured my lips with his. The kiss was gentle and filled with the love that was overflowing from him. He kissed me for several minutes, before trailing his lips across her cheeks and then he lowered his head to gently nip the smooth silk of my throat. I was no longer crying, as he continued to gently kiss me all over my mouth, face and neck.

Moments later he reluctantly pulled away from me and once again looked into my eyes. "Let's go home."

x x x

With my eyes closed and a smile on my lips, I awakened slowly in Damon's bed, letting memories of the previous night drift lazily through my mind like soft music. Together we went to have dinner at Enzo and he introduced me to his partner Enzo and the other staff. After dinner, we went back to Damon's apartment. We talked and made love. Trust and commitment, I sleepily decided, evidently had a very profound effect on lovemaking, because last night's stormy lovemaking had completely eclipsed everything else that had gone before.

Sunlight filtered through the draperies across the room, and I rolled over onto my back, opening my eyes. Damon had kissed me good-bye a while ago, and said he was going out to get some sweet rolls for our breakfast. He'd left a cup of coffee on the table beside the bed for me, and I eased up onto the pillows.

I had just taken a sip when he walked into the room with a white bakery bag in his hand, a folded newspaper under his arm, and a smile on his handsome face. "Good morning," I said, smiling as he bent over to kiss me. "It smells nice," I added as he opened the bakery bag and grabbed a sweet roll.

I took a bite of the roll when Damon passed it to my mouth. "Hmm. Taste like heaven."

He frowned. "I thought this is heaven," he said before seizing my mouth in a smouldering kiss until we were both gasping for breath.

"This is heaven, definitely heaven," I told Damon in a hoarse voice, still slightly breathless.

"I can give you more than heaven," he said teasingly. "Move in with me and I will show you."

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Okay I will move in with you," I said slowly, my voice low and serious as I added. "But there is a condition."

Damon quirked a brow at me. "What condition?"

"You can't make me do all the cooking and cleaning the dishes," I gave him one of my breathtaking smiles. "Cooking and cleaning the dishes are you job."

He grinned at me. "Deal."


	24. Chapter 24

**Damon**

"Where are we going?" Elena asked for the tenth time since we got into the car this morning.

"That's a secret."

"That isn't fair," she protested. "You promise you would never keep things from me."

"Sorry, I'm not telling you." I took my eyes off the heavy traffic long enough to flash her a brilliant smile.

"You still aren't going to tell me where we are going, are you, you devil!" She pouted.

"I'm saving it for a surprise," I laughed softly.

Elena had been staying with me for the last three months, and although my apartment was not huge, it was comfortable. I hadn't felt so happy in my life for a long, long time. Elena made me feel loved, complete, and perfect. We did fight at times and couldn't agree with each other. I doubted we would ever stop fighting sometimes, but it was almost like…foreplay. Besides, I wasn't the type of man who needed a wife who didn't challenge me. And I knew Elena adored my loving alpha male, protective personality. She made me feel safe, and there was never a day that I didn't feel loved, even if I was pissed off at her for something.

"We are here." I said as I turned a corner and then she saw where we were going and she gave me a curious look.

"You know I work just around the corner, right?" she said as she stepped out of the car. "This street is famous for its eateries."

"uh-huh," I answered as I led her to a shop. There was sign in front of the shop: SOLD.

"Welcome, Dr Gilbert." I took out a key and unlocked the door.

Elena stared open mouthed at me. "How did you get the key? Did you buy the shop?"

"Come in and I will explain," I smiled at her.

"You did buy the shop, didn't you?" She turned to face me. 'I knew it. And how dare you keep this from me?" She swatted my shoulder playfully.

I chuckled and wrapped one arm around her and pulled her hard against my chest. "This is supposed to be a present. A present for you." I said as I took her chin in my hands and lifted her eyes up to meet mine. She looked so surprised.

"Present? For me?"

I loved this woman in my arms, both now and then and I couldn't believe we had wasted so much time and I had hurt her. I felt at an all-time low and vowed to make it up to her the rest of our lives.

"Elena, I have so much to apologize for, so very much," I started. "I shouldn't have left you five years ago. I shouldn't run away whenever there is a bump on the road. I was hurting so badly and I thought running away could solve the problem. I was wrong, completely wrong. Facing the problem is the way to deal with a problem. I was a real coward," I said and her luminous eyes filled with tears.

"I will never let you go again. You're marrying me, and then I'll show you every damn day how lucky I feel to have you as mine." I wiped away the tear that slid down her cheek. "I'm not sure love even explains how I feel. Dammit…I love you, but it's more than that. That first time we were together again, after these five years, knocked me off my feet. Every time I touch you, it's never enough. It's so much more than sex. It's because I love you even more today than I did five years ago. Please tell me you'll forgive me. Tell me you are going to marry me," I pled with her.

Elena broke out in a beautiful smile. "But we haven't even talked about marriage yet," she protested weakly.

"I bought this shop for you. We will call it Delena. Remember what does Delena mean?" I grasped both sides of her head and covered her mouth with mine, kissing her roughly, my tongue taking possession of hers, melding us together.

She moaned as I reluctantly pulled away and once again looked into her eyes. 'Elena, I love you. Say you'll marry me." I kissed her again and pushed her back against the wall of the building, a dark, secluded corner where we wouldn't be seen. "Please say you will marry me."

"Damon," my name left her lips with a sigh. "I love you too. And yes, I'll marry you."

I reached into my pocket, grinning as I dug deeper for the small box I had been hoping to give her today. I popped open the lid, the glimmering diamond catching every ray of the dim light. "I'm not even going to ask you to marry me again because you already said yes and you can't take it back," I grumbled, not willing to even take that chance. I pulled the ring from the box, put the container back in my pocket and took her hand, slipping the diamond onto her finger.

Mine.

Holy hell, she looked good wearing my ring, a physical declaration that she was finally mine.

"Damon, I don't know what to say," she murmured, her eyes traveling from the ring to my face. "Damn. All I've done is cry." Her eyes were bright with tears.

"Nothing," I answered in a rush. "Don't say anything. You already said yes." No backing out now. She'd already agreed to marry me. There was nothing more to say. "Just kiss me," I suggested hopefully, hoping she wasn't going to cry again. "I don't want to see you sad anymore," I admitted in a ragged voice.

Elena stroked my cheek, and then put her hand behind my neck to give me the sweetest kiss I had ever had. I savoured it, savoured an embrace that was full of tenderness and love, a connection that was so much more than passion. She pulled away slowly and whispered huskily, "I'm not sad. I'm overwhelmed. I've never been this happy and it's almost scary."

"Then get used to being terrified, because I plan to keep you happy ever damn day," I answered with a devilish grin, knowing exactly how she felt. For a man who had lived in isolation and darkness for so long, being this damn happy was so terrifying, but I would risk it. "You'll get used to it eventually."

'What are you going to do with this shop?" she asked.

"I think this place will be great for a café which serves brunch and lunch." I winked at her before continuing. "And you, my wife can come here for morning tea and lunch. Free of charge. For the rest of your life."

"What about Enzo?" She frowned. "You will be busy running both Denzo and Delena."

"I have told Enzo I will only help out in Denzo Monday to Thursday night. No working on Friday night, weekends or public holidays." I grinned as I looked at her. "I'm all yours on Friday night, weekends and public holidays. Do you love my plan?"

"Yes, I love it!" She smiled back at me. "I love you, Damon Salvatore. Now take me back home and you can show me how much you love me," she ordered, wrapping her arms securely around my shoulders.


	25. Epilogue

**Elena**

"Blow out the candles, baby," I said to my two year old daughter. I couldn't believe how much my life had changed in the last few years. I was happier than I could've ever thought possible.

The crowd erupted in applause as Sarah blew out her two candles and rewarded everyone with her precious smile and giggles.

"That's daddy's good girl. I can't believe how big you are," Damon said to our daughter, before scooping her up in his arms.

He then wrapped me close to him, still as passionate about me as the day we had reunited. I had given him the gift of his daughter, and my love, and he couldn't be any happier. No more running away. That's my Damon.

I looked around our yard, grateful for the beautiful Chicago day. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, as if the fates were shining down on us. Stefan, Valarie and Giuseppe were playing on the enormous play structure with the children. This was my family. Our family.

Damon and I were married the next evening after he proposed, the ceremony private. Our wedding was a joyous union of two souls that had always been meant for each other. Soul mates who had finally found the peace that comes with being side by side, after years of separation, pain and desolation.

We had come home to Mystic Falls after our wedding ceremony, Enzo and Bonnie had come with us, Stefan and Valarie, and Giuseppe all assembled for a belated celebration of marriage that had taken them all by surprise. Giuseppe and Stefan were happy about me joining the family. Most important of all, I was happy that Damon had his family again.

"We've done really well, Damon," I said, with a satisfied smile and wrapped my arm around his waist.

"Yes we have," Damon agreed triumphantly. "I can't believe how stupid I was in the past, thinking running away could make life easier. Family sticks together, no matter what happens," he added.

"Yes, we all stick together, no matter what happens," I smiled at him as I pulled him close for a kiss.

 _THE END_


End file.
